


Fledge

by xLyrael



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Alec has wings, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Child Alec Lightwood, Cover Art, M/M, Warlock Alec Lightwood, Wingfic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-30
Updated: 2018-09-09
Packaged: 2018-11-06 17:00:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 24,661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11040432
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xLyrael/pseuds/xLyrael
Summary: If there is one thing Magnus knows for certain, it's that the Lightwoods are nothing but trouble. This is further cemented as fact when he opens his door one morning only to have a child shoved into his arms with blood running down his back and Maryse Lightwood of all people begging him for help.





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As hinted at in the summary, the emergence of the wings is a bit messy. I don't think it warrants a tag, but you're being warned here just in case.

Magnus closed his eyes and took a deep breath of cool morning air, leaning against his balcony railing with coffee in hand. He had a few moments before his first client would arrive, and while he didn't anticipate the job taking up too much time or effort, he intended to enjoy the peace while he could. The individuals that tended to request the services of a High Warlock were rarely a calm bunch.

Case in point: Magnus was just finishing the last of his coffee when a loud, insistent banging started at his door. It seemed his client had arrived both disgustingly early and in a great hurry.  Magnus rolled his eyes and headed to the door, making a point to take the time to drop his mug into the kitchen sink on his way, despite typically preferring to handle such things with magic. Really, a routine translation did _not_ warrant taking his door down.

Once he had the door open, however, Magnus' eyes narrowed. In front of him was not the client he was expecting.

" _Maryse_ ," he grimaced. "I thought I told you—"

"I recall," Maryse bit out a tad desperately. "We need your help. We'll pay."

Magnus was stunned into silence; even he knew that to see Maryse Lightwood in any way other than absolutely in control, of herself if nothing else, was a bad sign. He glanced behind her at her husband, standing further back in the hall with a covered, wiggling bundle in his arms. A small, weak moan of pain coming from the bundle finally broke him out of his daze and he stepped back to usher the Lightwoods into his home.

"This needs to be quick, and it's going to be expensive," he muttered, ushering them into the sitting room. "What seems to be the—oh, dear."

Robert had uncovered his bundle, pushing the blanket away from the head of a little boy, no older than six or seven, Magnus guessed. The boy was flushed, panting and seemingly barely holding off sobs as he clutched at Robert's shirt, pressing his face into his father's chest. The dark hair gave it away: this was the Lightwood boy.  

The boy was shirtless, and Magnus found his eyes glued to his back. The expanse of it was an angry red, and from his shoulder blades to near his hips were two large masses of… _something_ under his skin. Up towards his shoulders was the worst of it; the bulging masses were clearly proving to be too much for the boy's thin skin, and it was stretched to a dark, purplish red, bleeding where it had begun to tear in some places.

Magnus swallowed and held out his arms. "Hand him here." When all he received were mistrustful glares, he said, "This is going to get much more painful before it is through, and I can take away some of the pain." He had seen this before, many years ago, though he hoped for the boy's sake it was something different. If his suspicions were correct, this boy was destined to become a pariah, at best. He didn't want to consider the worst case scenarios. While Shadowhunters might not be very high on his list of people he enjoyed being around, it was hard to harbor the same ill-will against a suffering child.

When he finally had him in his arms, Magnus carried the surprisingly light child to the couch and sat, gently, setting him on his lap and letting him lean against his chest. He rested his palm against his lower back, rubbing slowly and soothingly as he let his magic run through the boy.

"There you go," Magnus murmured as he felt the boy shudder and relax in relief. "A little better now, hm?" A small nod as he stared up at Magnus in wonder. "What's your name, sweetheart?"

"Alec," he whispered.

"Alec, I'm Magnus. I'm going to help you through this, okay?" Another small nod. Magnus turned to his parents. "Why did you wait so long to seek help? Things like this don't just spring up overnight."

Robert winced. "We were called away and he hid it from his minder."

Magnus looked at the two incredulously. What kind of care was this boy in that something like this was easily hidden? He felt a tug on his shirt before he could question them further, though Maryse's glare told him all he needed to know. He looked down to see tearful eyes looking up at him.

"Am I going to die?" Alec asked softly.

Magnus' eyes widened. "Dear lord, no. You're going to be just fine, I promise. It might take a while, and it will be a little scary, but you'll be okay." He let out a relieved breath when this appeased him, watching as Alec accepted his assurances and settled against Magnus' chest.

His parents were not so easily calmed.

"So you know what's going on?" Maryse demanded, watching the interaction rigidly from the doorway.

"I have my suspicions. If you two will give me a moment to do some assessments, I can give you a more concrete answer." To his relief, Maryse acquiesced with only slightly obvious internal debate, her husband trailing behind her to another small couch.

When he figured he could be sure they would stay put and behave while his focus was elsewhere, Magnus closed his eyes and murmured softly in a language few knew, casting his magic outward toward the small being in his lap.

Magnus slowly reached into the boy and searched. There was the fear, and further, the childish joy and love that had yet to be snuffed out by the harsh lifestyle he was born into, but further down… Further down was _Alec_ , the essence of the person in his arms at the basest level, what he was _made of_. Magnus was aware of the angelic power flowing through him typical of a Shadowhunter, the hints of the mundane, human side of him, but— _there!_ —that's what Magnus was looking for. Small, yet to be fully awoken, a spark of magic that had nothing to do with the angels these people so revered.   

As Magnus gently pulled his awareness back to the present, he unconsciously clutched Alec tighter. He wasn't sure what he would do if the Lightwoods reacted too poorly to this news. Before he could speak, however, Alec began squirming. He loosened his grip, but the boy continued, letting out a small moan of pain that Magnus tried his best to lessen. It seemed he would have to explain afterwards; Alec's body wasn't on anyone's schedule but its own. He looked at the couple sitting across from him and leveled them with a serious look.

"What you're about to see is going to shock you, and you're going to want to help your son. I know what I'm asking of you, but you need to trust me and not interfere." He continued quickly before he could be interrupted. "I will take as much pain as I can, but he will still be hurting. It should be over quickly and he _will_ be okay. You must not—" He didn't get any further before the boy in his lap let out a pitiful wail, curling in on himself and clutching at Magnus' shirt. The torn skin at his shoulders, already stretched thin around the mass underneath, ripped more, and Magnus pulled the pain away as quickly as he could.

The next minutes were a blur of noise and activity; Alec's pain, his parents' shock and anger as they leapt off the couch but could not make themselves come closer, blood and skin and—wet, matted feathers.

Once he could tell they were all the way out and would do no more damage, Magnus switched his focus from taking Alec's pain to healing the mess left over on his back as Alec shook against him. Only when there was nothing left to heal and Alec was simply resting against him, limp and dazed, did Magnus stop and assess the aftermath.

The Lightwoods were frozen in shock. Alec's back, while unharmed and back to normal, was covered in drying blood and fluid, and extending from near his shoulder blades were two wet, dark, matted wings, feathered like a bird's—or an angel's, though Magnus knew better. He let out a slow breath and made quick work of magicking the mess away, being more careful once he got to the wings.

Alec twitched as Magnus' magic flowed over his quivering new wings, clearing them of blood and mucus and leaving them dry, straightened, and shining.

"There. Good as new. Even better, maybe," Magnus said, trying to coax some reaction out of Alec other than fear and shock. Instead, it looked like the Lightwoods had awoken from their stupor and the only thing keeping them silent was deciding if they were more furious or horrified. Before they could erupt, Magnus decided that it would be in everyone's best interest if Alec were to get an uninterrupted introduction to his new additions, and decided to quite literally freeze them in place for a moment, stealthily turning so that they were out of Alec's view.

Alec blinked and took a few breaths, adjusting to suddenly being pain-free. He looked at Magnus. "I'm okay now?"

"Indeed you are. Do you feel any differently now?"

"I—my back isn't as, as stretched? And I don't feeling like I'm—like I'm tied up anymore," Alec answered dreamily. Magnus expected it would be a while before the adrenaline wore off, but it would work in his favor. A high child was rarely a scared child, in his admittedly limited experience. Magnus watched as the small wings began to slowly and haltingly unfold.

"Mr. Magnus?" Alec asked with a frown.

"Yes, child?"

"Why's it feel like I got two more—more—uh—somethin's on my back? And I can—I can move them? What—" Magnus saw his eyes widen as he caught sight of an expanding wing out of the corner of his eye. Since he clearly didn't have full control yet, Magnus gently helped him guide one small wing forward, wrapping slightly around Alec's side so that he could see the black, iridescent feathers more clearly.

"Ah—neat, huh? Very pretty," Magnus prompted cheerily as he noted Alec's breath speeding up, but to no avail. The child's eyes widened as he continued to hyperventilate until he simply passed out into Magnus' shirt. Before he could shake the boy or something, Magnus jumped at the sound of a knock at his door, groaning when he realized his actual, scheduled client had arrived at last.

He sighed, looking around his once-calm home at the frozen Lightwoods and their unconscious son and wondered where he had gone so wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you thought, good or bad! Things will be explained in future chapters, of course, but for now I want to sort of gauge interest. I'm not sure how well people will like this style (a little more realism than "*poof* suddenly wings"). I'm also not sure what route I want to take re: Alec growing up knowing what he is, or his parents' reactions being so poor that Magnus hides it, so you might have to give me a minute to map things out before the next chapter. I'm relatively certain that only the first few chapters will have kid!Alec, and there's absolutely no underage business here.
> 
> There's no beta for this story, though if you see an error I missed and feel like letting me know, I'm more than happy to fix it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy cow. You people really know how to make an author feel special. Thank you all so much for such an awesome response to the first chapter! I never expected it to get that kind of reaction, so that was very nice to wake up to! Enjoy #2.

Magnus stood in the middle of his sitting room and took one last deep breath in peace. He had placated the client at his door and now looked at the Lightwood child’s small form, curled up where Magnus had laid him on the couch, dark little wings instinctively tucked up against his sides. Magnus knew first-hand how badly parents could react to the shock of finding out their perfect child was—something _else_. Something dark. Being born like _that_ , into a race as supposedly pure as the Shadowhunters? To Circle members, no less?

This child had a lot stacked against him.

Unfortunately for Magnus, keeping two adults frozen was a draining activity. As much as he would have preferred to simply leave them as statues for the world to forget, he steeled himself for the inevitable onslaught and released the spell.

The sudden change of positioning gave the Lightwood parents pause, if only for a moment. When Maryse eyed Alec’s unconscious form on the couch, Magnus hastened to reassure her lest she think the worst and begin yelling about something else.

“He’s fine,” he said calmly, trying to encourage a quiet tone so that the boy would continue to sleep through any potential outbursts. “Just exhausted and overwhelmed.”

"You call that _fine_?" Maryse hissed. "What _is_ that?"

Magnus tensed. " _That_ is your son, who just went through something traumatic and is going to need you—now more than ever." Maryse just pressed her lips together and continued glaring at the wings as if she could burn them off with pure will. Magnus tried appealing to any latent sympathy she or her husband might possess. "The only other known person who is both Nephilim and warlock had to grow up without her parents, and she—"

" _Shut up_!" Maryse bit out, eyes wild.

" _Excuse_ you—"

"I said, shut up, Bane. Don't you dare insinuate that _our son_ , a _Lightwood_ —

"And just what else could he possibly be?" Magnus asked in disbelief. "I could see his magic perfectly clearly." Maryse scoffed. "It's there, _Lightwood_ ," he mocked, "latent so far, but there."

"If that were true, he'd be dead," Robert chimed in, a strange look on his face. "One-off… _anomalies_ aside," he continued carefully, "Shadowhunters can't carry warlocks. Our blood is simply incompatible."

"If the breathing evidence wasn't currently napping on my sofa, I would agree with you, but the facts are right there for you to see. The boy has both magic and a mark."

"Magic that, conveniently, only you can see," Maryse said.

Magnus rolled his eyes and settled into a chair. If he was going to be accused of lying, he might as well be comfortable. "How many stages are after denial, again? I really don't have all day to walk you through this."

"I think I may have another explanation," Robert said, stopping Maryse's impending tirade short as she whipped around to stare at him.

"Do tell," Magnus said, eyebrow raised. Maryse, for once, seemed to be of the same mind, glaring expectantly at her husband. Robert leaned in and whispered briefly into her ear. Magnus watched as Maryse paled and brought a shaky hand to her mouth, and he wondered just how many more surprises the day could possibly have left.

"Actually," Robert said stiffly, stepping back to address Magnus and clearing his throat uncomfortably, "I think we should get going. We should be able to handle this—situation—from here. Please send your bill to the Institute."

"Ah-ah! Speaking of the bill…" Magnus said swiftly, holding up a hand to keep the Lightwoods from leaving. Honestly, they didn't think they could dangle something like _that_ in front of him and expect him to simply walk them out, did they?

"You know how we warlocks do so love to bow to your every whim for _very_ expensive shiny objects, but when you've been alive as long as I have, _knowledge_ also becomes a valuable commodity," Magnus said with a flourish.

Maryse squinted at him as Robert said, "I don't think I follow."

Magnus smirked. "I told you this would be expensive. You are going to explain to me, in detail, exactly what you're so sure your son is, and," he added, raising his voice to drown out the sudden protests, "you're going to do so without complaint. You see, this will lower the monetary side of the bill enough to keep the Clave from knocking down my door demanding to know why they had to bring my payment in a flatbed. Don't think I wouldn't tell them. The _scandal_! The _gossip_! The _Lightwood child_ , already exiled, is—"

"Enough!" Maryse looked as if she would be ill. She closed her eyes for a moment, then sighed harshly, resigned, and sat across from Magnus, her husband following uneasily. "We will tell you. But it will be the full payment, and no one else will know of it from you."

"Very well," Magnus said, motioning for her to get on with it. Call him petty, but he was beginning to think this day might not be all bad after all if he could put a look like that on Maryse Lightwood’s face.

When his wife didn’t seem as if she’d be able to get the words out, Robert began. “Valentine—”

“This isn’t right,” Maryse interrupted. “Let’s just pay him and leave.” Robert set a hand on her shoulder, though whether he did it in support or to keep her from fleeing, Magnus couldn’t tell.

“He’s dead, Maryse. It’s over. Bane is right; it wouldn’t be worth the scrutiny of the Clave. We might know that Alec isn’t a warlock, but the Clave… they wouldn’t understand the truth, and they wouldn’t understand our motives. They’ve proven that already,” he finished with a frown. When no further protests came, he continued, looking at his son’s sleeping form pensively.

“Valentine was— _obsessed_ —with the idea that Shadowhunters, the way we are now, aren’t enough. He thought the Angel should have given us more, made us more powerful. He would experiment… on himself, on his followers… He claimed nothing would be enough until Shadowhunters had the numbers and the power to—” He glanced at Magnus and hesitated.

“Please, don’t feel the need to sugarcoat things for my sake,” Magnus murmured. “I am very familiar with what Valentine wanted. What _you_ want. Carry on. Information I already have isn’t going to pay for much.”

Maryse sneered. “He wanted the elimination of all demon-blooded beings on Earth,” she stated bluntly. “Only then would he consider our mission from the Angel complete, and he was willing to do anything to achieve the ability to do so.”

“And his followers,” Robert added, “would do anything Valentine asked, even if they didn’t know his true intentions. He told us he had finally perfected the process for creating an— _evolved_ Shadowhunter. A new generation that would be more powerful than any that had come before it. He asked, and we volunteered. He gave me a drink I was to consume before intimacy, and gave Maryse monthly injections once she had conceived.”

Maryse blinked slowly. “I don’t actually remember much of my pregnancy with Alec. Valentine put me to sleep for the injections because of the pain, and as the pregnancy went on, I got so sick. We thought I might miscarry, but Valentine was insistent that everything was fine.” She looked up defiantly. “And it was. Alec was born a perfectly healthy baby. There were no discernable differences between him and any other Shadowhunter infant, but Valentine was sure we would be able to tell in time.”

“And now he’s dead,” Robert said. “Five years later and we thought it was all for nothing, that Alec was just a normal child, but I suppose he was right after all. We just had to wait.” He was looking at Alec with something like hesitant reverence, which made Magnus want to vomit. He supposed, though, that being some strange version of ‘the chosen one’ was probably better than your parents trying to kill you for existing.

Magnus looked between the two, searching for any signs of deceit. This was much more interesting than he had expected. “And what, pray tell, was he giving you both?” When neither answered, he said delightedly, “Oh, don’t tell me you don’t _know_. You were letting some lunatic experiment on your _child_ and you weren’t even the slightest bit curious about what that entailed?”

Maryse glared. “That _lunatic_ was ensuring a better world for our child—for all Shadowhunters. It was a risk worth taking. The Clave might not understand, but Alec might just be the warrior Valentine was always striving for.”

“Super,” Magnus grimaced. “I hate to burst your self-righteous bubble—pardon me, I meant _live for_ bursting bubbles—but it sounds an awful lot like Valentine was experimenting with the very thing he wanted to get rid of.”

“What are you talking about?” Robert demanded.

“If it looks like a duck, and it quacks like a duck, it’s a warlock.”

“Have you heard nothing we just said?” Maryse demanded. “You think Valentine would allow his new generation to be anything but pure?”

“And just look at him,” Robert said. “What are those if not angel wings?”

“You’re kidding,” Magnus said, shocked. They were so dense he wouldn’t be surprised to see a Shadowhunter trying to reason a house fire into extinguishing itself. “Wings are a very common warlock mark. Surely you know this?”

“Demon wings, sure,” Robert dismissed. “Bat wings, scaly wings… But these? Feathered, like in the stories.”

“Delusional, your whole race.” Magnus pinched the bridge of his nose. “I hate to even ask, but how do you explain the magic he has? There _is_ a difference between types of magic, you know. His is not angelic.”

Maryse swallowed, the only sign she wasn’t as sure as she wanted him to think. “You’re mistaken, clearly.”

“Clearly,” Magnus said.

Before anything else could be said, the boy on the couch began to stir. He rubbed his eyes with a little fist, then froze as he saw three pairs of eyes on him.

“Mama?”

“Come here, baby,” Maryse answered softly, holding out her hand. Magnus didn’t think he’d live to see Maryse do anything _softly_. Alec wiggled off the couch and took a couple of steps towards his mother, then froze again, eyes wide, as his wings adjusted behind him. “It’s alright, Alec,” she said, scooping him up onto her lap. “You’ll—get used to them.”

Alec clutched his mother’s shirt as he warily eyed what he could see of his new wings. “Is it bad? Am I still sick?”

“No, son,” Robert said, stroking Alec’s hair. “You’re fine. They’re—a gift. From the Angel.”

“The _Angel_?” Alec asked in awe. “Did Izzy get some too?”

“Just you, Alec,” Maryse answered. Alec hummed, looking less than pleased with this. Magnus had to quell the urge to snicker as the image of this small child giving the Angel some choice words about sharing with others flashed through his mind.

“Well,” Magnus said, clapping his hands and startling the boy. It seemed he had forgotten about the stranger in the room, and was now beet red and hidden in the folds of his mother’s blouse. “As, ah, _sweet_ as this is, I do have other clients to tend to, so if we’re quite through…”

Robert and Maryse shared a look before Robert said, “Actually—”

“Of course we’re not through,” Magnus muttered.

“We’ll need a glamour,” Robert continued. “The Clave will need to be… eased into something like this, and if anyone at the Institute saw, it would spread—more quickly than we might be ready for.”

“Ah, yes, very nice. Tell me all about how your little club planned to eradicate my species, and then ask for more favors,” Magnus said drily. “How long until your dear Clave will be ready, then? Is this glamour to last, say, a week? Two?” When he just got shifty looks as an answer, he sighed. “You’re seriously asking me to give you an indefinite glamour? I know how much money you have access to, Lightwood, and it’s not that much.”

“What else are we supposed to do?” Maryse asked. “If the Clave finds out before we think of a way to explain it, they could take him away. I know you think I’m the monster here, Bane, but I will not allow _anyone_ to harm my child.”

“Right, as long as he’s a gift from the Angel and not a dirty—”

“Will you do it or not, Bane?” Maryse demanded.

“I will not.” Magnus let the two stew in confused fury for a moment before adding, “However, I may have a compromise.”

“Then spit it out.”

“Charming, the lot of you.” Magnus rolled his eyes. “I have a friend who is powerful enough to cast long-term glamours that would likely last around a year or so. In any other case, this would cost you more than you could even imagine, especially if you insist on this for his whole childhood.” Magnus paused to let that sink in. He knew they would never agree to his terms if they weren’t just desperate enough. “But—I’d be willing to ask her to cut you a deal.”

“What do you want, Warlock Bane?” Robert asked.

“My friend will cast a glamour on your son’s wings once a year. At that time, she will also monitor the growth of his magic,” Magnus said. “No other cost. It’s that simple.”

“I told you that you’re mistaken—”

“Then what’s the harm?” Magnus interrupted. “If there’s nothing to monitor, humor me and you’re getting yearly glamours for free. If there _is_ something to monitor, you could be preventing excruciating damage from long-term magic repression. People could get hurt. _Your son_ could get hurt.”

Alec peeked out hesitantly at that, prompting Maryse to stand in a huff, reaching for the blanket to re-wrap him so they could leave.

“Send your friend to the Institute today. I expect this to be a very good glamour,” Maryse said. She handed the bundled child to her husband and led them out the door without a look back.

Magnus heaved a deep sigh, summoning both a very strong drink and his home phone.

“Tessa, dear. What you are doing for the next ten years?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brief(ish) note: I’ve added some cover art to chapter one and outlined up to the beginning of the canon timeline. We're going to hang out with kid!Alec for about two more chapters, and then we’ll be introduced to the Alec we know today. I want to thank everyone who commented with suggestions for the plot! I'll be able to respond to everyone soon. I can’t please everyone, but hopefully what I came up with hits a bit of a middle ground. A lot of you really wanted supportive parents and for Alec to know what he is growing up, and I did try to incorporate those while still staying true to what we know canonically of their characters. Let me know if it's working as we go! I can't guarantee updates will always be this quick, but I'll do my best.
> 
> As always, I’d love to know what you thought of this chapter, good or bad. It’s essentially one long business negotiation, so I’m hoping it wasn’t too boring!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is basically snapshots of Alec as a child. Because of that, if the section is in his POV or the kids are talking, the grammatical mistakes are on purpose. I tried to capture his age in any given section. Let me know if it's awful, haha.

After some light, dignified begging and a bit of creative bribery from Magnus, Tessa Gray was ready to settle in New York City for the foreseeable future.

In the interest of avoiding a comatose state from excessive energy expenditure, the glamour Tessa cast on the Lightwood boy was very lightweight in order to last as long as possible. Anyone who already knew the wings were there, or who spent a significant amount of time around them, would eventually be able to see through it. Everyone else would simply… not notice them. Their eyes would slide right over where the wings were unless they knew what they were looking for, similar to the glamour already over the Institute itself.

When Alec shivered after she finished the glamour, Tessa realized suddenly that he probably hadn’t been able to put on any of his shirts since the whole mess had started, and asked his parents for one or two of his shirts to fiddle with. She went back later that week and spelled the rest of his shirts, having brainstormed with Magnus to figure out the best way to fix the issue. Alec’s wardrobe was now completely wing-friendly, though she would have to redo the spell as he grew and obtained new clothes. For now, though, the fabric could form itself around where his wings grew out of his shoulders, altering itself while blending in with the existing glamour. He could even slide the shirts on right over his head, like everyone else, and the fabric adjusted and re-formed itself with the movements.

It had taken her and Magnus four whole days to come up with the spell, so she was rather proud of herself when Alec, after putting on a shirt that hadn’t been messily cut up by a well-intentioned Izzy for the first time in nearly a week, laughed and rushed to hug her before shyly stepping back and thanking her. She smiled as she watched him delightedly poking around at the magically formed holes that allowed his wings to remain unconstrained as his parents, begrudgingly grateful, walked her out.

At the advanced age of six (almost seven!) years old, Alec thought he was pretty smart. Especially since the other kids that sometimes stayed at the Institute always seemed kind of dumb. Besides Izzy, of course. Sometimes he thought Izzy was smarter than he was even though he was older, because she always understood stuff faster than he did. But that was okay, because he was bigger, so he thought he would probably be better at fighting demons, which was cooler anyway.

Alec was glad Izzy was so smart because a few weeks after his wings had grown in she was the one that figured out that he had to take care of them in special ways. She had dragged him out to the cemetery behind the Institute so they could watch the birds and compare their wings to his, and she was fixated on the two fluttering around in the birdbath.

“Lookit, Alec—the water goes right off,” she said, pointing. “Why doesn’t yours do that?”

Alec pursed his lips in thought and brought one wing around his side—he could do that now; he practiced—so he could look more closely at it.

“I think they did when they got here first. The water in the bath just dripped off and I could kinda shake the rest off after like those birds are.”

“Now you stay soggy forever!” Izzy groaned. She had to help dry them off every time he took a bath now and it was _so_ boring.

Alec huffed. “Why does it go off them so easy but mine stay so wet?” Izzy didn’t have an answer for him, so they continued watching. “Look at the one on the stone there, Izzy. What’s it doing to the feathers?”

A few moments of contemplation later Izzy answered, “I think it’s, it’s like brushing the feathers like hair, but with its mouth.” She eyed Alec’s wings. “I don’t think a brush would do very good for your wings ‘cause they’re so big. But sometimes when I dry them they get a little bent, so I just fix it with my fingers. Is it like that?”

He bit his lip before nodding decisively. “I think you’re right, ‘cause when you fix the bendy ones it feels better.”

“Good,” Izzy said seriously, then brightened. “Hey! Let’s go to the library and see if there’s books on birds. You can read them all and see if they know how to make water not stay so much after your bath.”

The trip to the library was harder than they expected; Izzy could barely read at all, and Alec could read a whole chapter book but had never seen such big words all at once before, so they recruited Hodge to help them because he practically lived in the library anyway.

With Hodge’s help, they discovered that a special oil helped bird wings stay waterproof and nice and shiny, and Hodge said he would try to find something that would work the same way for Alec’s wings. Izzy asked who bought the oil for the birds. Hodge pointed to something called a "gland" that was _not_ in a nice place, and Alec was suddenly very glad that his parents were sure he had angel wings and not bird wings because _no_ _thank you_.

They also discovered stuff that sounded kind of scary and gross to Alec, like _molting._ He wasn’t sure if he liked his wings yet, but he didn’t really like the idea of all the feathers falling out just so they could grow new ones. But Hodge pointed in the book where it said something about molting and energy and said Alec would probably have to eat _a lot_ if he did molt, which sounded pretty good. Alec liked snacks.

 

Sometimes when his mama would sing to him at bedtime she would run her fingers through Alec’s wings, and it felt really nice. Sometimes she would even help him put the oil on. But when he looked at her face he couldn’t tell if she was happy or sad. When he asked, she just said his wings were a gift and they should all be grateful, but her face was still funny and it made him feel funny when he thought about his wings, and he thought that maybe he didn’t _want_ to be very grateful. If they were such a great gift, why couldn't anybody else know about them? He hoped the Angel wouldn’t get mad at him for not liking his gift all that much.

 

Everyone was being so weird about the wings that Alec wasn’t really sure he wanted to use them at all. Sometimes they were a gift, and sometimes no one would even look at them. The only person who consistently thought they were great was Izzy, and she didn’t count because she thought Alec was always great.

Part of him hoped that if he ignored them then the Angel would take them back and give them to someone else. After weeks and weeks of both Izzy and Hodge pestering him about it, though, he finally gave in and tried to learn to fly.

First, Hodge just had him run up and down the training room either flapping his wings or holding them straight out. Alec thought that was pretty dumb because at first all it did was make him run slower. He wanted to see Hodge try running laps with a huge, heavy parachute behind him and see how _he_ liked it.

Izzy suggested they push him off the roof like mama birds, but was outvoted.

After a while of Hodge and Izzy both yelling very unhelpful suggestions while they watched him run, Alec finally got his wings tilted at the right angle to lift himself just off the tip of his toes, gliding for a few inches. He promptly landed on his face, but they all considered that a win and called it a day.

After a lot of practice, he was starting to get the hang of gliding, though he hadn’t figured out how to truly fly yet. Sometimes Alec would close his eyes while he was in the air and just feel the wind on his face. He was starting to think that maybe this whole wing thing might not be so bad after all, and then Izzy _actually_ pushed him off the roof.

Well, not the _roof_ , but Alec’s bruised wrist didn’t really care about the difference between that and the high ceiling beams in the training room. When Hodge found out, he’d lectured them on pulling dangerous stunts like that before they could take healing runes, and then realized that if all Alec had was a bruised wrist after falling from that height, it must have worked at least a little.

Hodge set up a training beam at a much more reasonable height, and after a few frustrating months of working at it Alec could finally _fly_.

 

After a few years of hearing his parents whisper to each other about _warriors_ and _gifts_ , Alec wasn’t surprised when his formal Shadowhunter training began a little earlier than usual.

He excelled at his physical training, working with Hodge to develop new ways to incorporate his wings into typical training routines. Hodge made sure he was proficient in any weapon he came across, but focused on the bow; Alec would always have the high ground, even in a flat field. He wasn’t sure how Hodge thought he would explain that high ground to other Shadowhunters, but he was having too much fun training to worry about it too much.

Runes were a different story. Alec had been studying his runes since he could read; he had no trouble with them in the theoretical sense. In performance, though, they didn’t last nearly as long as they should, and when they did last, they were much weaker. When someone else applied the runes they were marginally stronger, but the ones done by Alec himself were weak and inconsistent.

Alec was frustrated and confused. He was supposed to be the _best_ —or at least, that’s what his parents expected him to be. He was supposed to be some special warrior created specifically by the Angel, yet he was the worst Shadowhunter ever. The most confusing thing to him, though, was his parents’ reaction. He thought they would be disappointed in him, angry that he wasn’t as good as they thought he would be. When they told him it was okay, that he probably needed to simply grow into his strength since he was young, he was so relieved he almost cried.

Behind closed doors, however, he could hear their anger. He was on his way to dinner when he heard hushed shouting coming from his mother’s office. He could only hear bits and pieces, but what he did catch made him lose his appetite. He could tell she was on the phone, though not who she was yelling at. It sounded to Alec like this person was to blame for his runes being so weak, and the idea that it was preventable, that maybe he could be normal in just _one way_ if not for this person, made him so mad he shut himself in the training room and shot arrows until his arms hurt too much to continue.

He was so focused that he never noticed the lights flickering with the rhythm of his shots.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully it wasn't too boring, because the next chapter is formatted pretty much the same way to get us through his teen years, and then we'll be left with the Alec this story focuses on. For anyone who hasn't read the books: yes, mama Lightwood sang to most of her kids.
> 
> 2k words goes by a lot more quickly when there's not much dialog. I'll try to get the next chapter out pretty soon! As always, let me know what you thought, good or bad!


	4. Chapter 4

Alec and Izzy were the only kids at the Institute. They trained, studied, and played either alone or with each other. They thought maybe that was the reason they were the only ones who noticed that the Institute was probably haunted; everyone else was a grownup, and therefore too busy to notice anything except other grownups. They could never gather enough evidence since it was just little, strange occurrences here and there, but they were sure they could eventually catch it in the act.

When Alec was just a few months past his runing ceremony, a family with two boys came to stay with them while their parents worked. Having just been runed themselves, Hodge thought it would be a good opportunity to let Alec practice with other kids at the same level. It quickly became clear that Alec’s runes didn’t have the same effect that the other boys’ did, something they began teasing him about once Hodge released them.

Alec was content to simply ignore the boys until he got to his room and could just lock them out and stew in peace, but when their words reached Izzy’s ears it was out of his hands. They didn’t even see her coming, and Alec thought that if it had just been one of them, she would have easily had the upper hand. However, these boys were bigger than Izzy and Alec both, and had been training for just that little bit longer. Eventually, one boy had a wildly struggling Alec pinned to the ground while Izzy hung off the back of the other as he swung around, trying to knock her off. They boys weren’t stupid enough to inflict any actual damage, but being helpless while some jerk was wrestling with his sister had Alec seething. Plus, the brute practically sitting on him was smushing his wings.

When the boy finally managed to dislodge Izzy, she landed with a grunt on the ground, wind knocked out of her, and Alec saw red. He still couldn’t get up, the boy on top of him was laughing, and his brother had his fist up like he was going to hit Izzy in the face, and she was still laying on the ground wheezing. Alec’s roar of frustrated rage left him just as every single window in the hallway shattered, freezing them all in place.

The one on Alec scrambled up. “What the hell was that?”

“Ha!” Izzy panted, getting her breath back as Alec sat up and tried to ignore the mess that was his wings. “Now you made our ghost mad. You should get out of here before it gets madder.”

“Are you crazy?” the other boy scoffed. “You can’t seriously think—”

He was cut off by the arrival of half the resident adults of the Institute, having been alerted to the breakage by the security system and seeing the kids alone on the monitors. After being asked a few questions, Alec and Izzy managed to sneak off while the adults argued over demonic energy and reckless kids, and they spent the rest of the night talking about the ghost while they straightened Alec’s feathers.

 

A couple years later, Jace arrived, and Izzy had to hunt Alec down in order to introduce the new brothers. No one outside the family had ever seen his wings, and Alec was sure that once Jace had been around him long enough to see through the glamor he would ask to go to another family.

Instead, Jace took one wide-eyed look at Alec’s wings and said, “Whoa.”

Alec blushed and tried to pull the wings in tighter. Some people working at the Institute had seen Alec in passing for _years_ and still had no clue he had wings. How was this kid able to see them right away? It didn’t seem fair. Yes, he was sure Jace would want to leave once he found out, but he thought he’d have at least a couple of weeks to see what a brother almost his own age was like. Max was cuter than most other babies Alec had seen, but it wasn’t the same as having someone he and Izzy could talk to.

“’Whoa’ what? You can see them?” Izzy demanded.

Jace blinked at her. “How could I miss them?” He walked closer to Alec and asked, “Can you fly with them?”

Alec nodded, still looking at the floor, arms crossed against his chest.

“They’re from the Angel!” Izzy injected with pride and a little bit of warning. “They’re like angel wings.”

Taking the hint, Jace seemed to notice how uncomfortable Alec was and asked, “Why are you upset? This is the coolest thing ever.”

Alec finally glanced up at that in shock. Maybe he’d get to have another brother after all.

It didn’t take long to convince Jace that the ghost was real, especially with all the flowers growing up the walls that hadn’t been there before he arrived.

 

After years of re-glamouring sessions, Alec and Tessa had formed something of a friendship despite only seeing each other once or twice a year. She did her best to give Alec a positive look at a warlock, since she knew the stereotypes that Shadowhunters taught their children, and often Alec’s childish curiosity meant their conversations could last for hours once his parents allowed him to travel alone. She hoped that this would soften the blow when the time came that they could no longer hide the truth. They weren’t close, but familiar enough with each other that Tessa could tell something was wrong as soon as Alec arrived for his next appointment, fidgeting with his hands and avoiding eye contact.

Eventually, she was able to pry an explanation out of him; he and his new brother had overheard a group of visiting Shadowhunters reminiscing about the good old days of trophy collecting. Alec hadn’t understood at the time, but Jace was able to explain what they meant—keeping warlock marks as spoils. Alec had been horrified.

After reassuring him that, no, she didn’t hate Shadowhunters, and _no_ , she definitely did not hate Alec, she was able to calm him down significantly and settled him in the sitting room while she called Magnus so that he could calm _her_ down. He let her vent for a bit about how she was afraid Alec would grow up hating what he was, and hate himself once he knew the truth, surrounded by people reinforcing their own awful versions of history, before finally interrupting and telling her she’d simply have to give him the opportunity to learn from someone less biased. Or at least, biased towards the other end of the spectrum.

“He sounds like a smart kid,” Magnus said. “Maybe it’s time for him to learn about history from the other side.”

Alec agreed wholeheartedly. He was confused, not sure why there was such tension between Shadowhunters and the Downworld, why his parents seemed to have such derision for the woman who helped him so much, and he would take every opportunity presented to him to learn more. After all, who was he, this strange new _thing_ , to judge anyone for being different? If this was how Shadowhunters reacted to those who were different, how would they react if they knew about Alec? His parents could crow about the Angel all they wanted; he was still _other_ , and he could see now that _other_ was bad.

And so Tessa and Alec had created a new routine: he would continue to come once a year for his glamours, but he would also sneak away once a month for Downworlder history lessons. After catching Jace make a snide comment about Vampires, Alec dragged him and Izzy along as well. 

 

If Izzy hadn’t practically shoved him into the room, Alec would have skipped the _parabatai_ ceremony altogether, no matter how many times Jace had told him he didn’t care if the bond might be weak.

It was weak, of course—for a moment. Alec was happy it had even worked at all, but that happiness was mixed with the bitter shame of yet another failure. Alec and Jace were both shocked when, after completing the ceremony, the faded rune Alec had drawn on Jace darkened to match his own, and the weak bond that could barely be felt strengthened, thrumming strongly along with their heartbeats.

Later, they discovered that it was true that runes applied by _parabatai_ were stronger. Alec had never felt more _normal_ than when he and Jace trained after applying each other’s runes. For the first time ever, Alec truly felt like a Shadowhunter, could really feel the full extent of each individual rune. Runing each other before training and, eventually, missions, became routine.

 

When he was fifteen, Alec walked around the building serving as a meeting point only to find Jace locked in an embrace with the young waitress of a nearby diner. Sickened at himself for feeling hurt, he left before either of them noticed he was there.

Izzy jokingly brought up the old ghost when lights and plants around the Institute started to inexplicably dim and wilt, but they were old enough that the childish explanation no longer held much weight, and decided to tell someone to buy some fertilizer or something.

 

Alec was almost sixteen when Izzy bullied her tutor into giving her more practical lessons in forensics rather than sticking strictly to theory. She gleefully took blood samples from anyone who stood still enough to prick, though Alec and Jace were willing enough if only to see if Alec’s blood was just as strange as the rest of him. Logically, Izzy reasoned, someone with a gift from the Angel would have more angelic blood than other Nephilim. Or maybe a whole new type of blood altogether.

As expected, Izzy’s blood was nearly indistinguishable from the example of Shadowhunter blood in her textbook. Jace’s blood took her a moment to decipher, and they were all surprised when it was evident that _he_ , for some reason, had significantly more angelic blood than he should.

“Huh,” she said. “Maybe I put in Alec’s instead?”

Jace shrugged as she moved to the next slide, supposedly Alec’s, though now they weren’t positive. Alec thought it made sense; Jace had always been stronger, faster, and better with runes than the rest of them. If anyone was going to have a gift from the Angel that actually worked, it would be him.

Nervous enough already, Alec tensed when Izzy frowned and moved away from her instruments, squinting between him and the samples in turn. 

“I think I need to take new samples,” she said, shaking her head. “I must have switched them with examples from the labs.”

Alec wasn’t so sure—it figured that this wouldn’t be the one time in his life when things were as expected. He and Jace obediently held out their arms to have their blood drawn again, and waited while she reexamined them.

Finally, she sighed and stepped back from the table and looked at her brothers.

“Jace, you definitely have a much larger percentage of angelic blood than typical Shadowhunters. We—we were all watching; there’s no way I accidentally switched them.” She paused, hesitantly turning to Alec as she took a steadying breath. “Alec, brother… your blood—you’ve got human and angelic blood, but there’s also—I’m sorry, Alec, I don’t know what this means, but you have _demon_ blood.”

“ _What_?” Jace blurted out after a heavy pause. “Surely he’d need more _angel_ blood to power his _angel_ wings, right? Take another sample; it’s got to be wrong.”

“It’s not wrong, Jace, I tested it just like the others.”

“And all three were different, even though we’re all Shadowhunters,” Jace said. “There’s no way he has demon blood, we’d know! And I have extra angel blood? No way. You have to be making some kind of mistake.”

“I’m doing it the exact same way the tutor taught me, Jace! I can’t change what it shows me.”

“Then let’s take it to the tutor—”

“No!” Alec shouted. “No. Please, Izzy, don’t show anyone else.” He was pale, wide-eyed, and a little shaky. Why had he never thought of this? Of course he wasn’t the warrior his mother said he should be—of course he couldn’t do a half-decent rune if his life depended on it—nothing about him was a _gift_ , he was a _monster_.

“Alec—” Izzy started, but he had already turned, starting towards the door. The room was suddenly much too small, and he needed air.

“Alec, wait!” Jace shouted, but he was already outside.

Neither of them followed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the wait, I have no idea where the time went but I was sure it had only been a few days since the last chapter. Whoops. Clearly I shouldn't make any promises, but I'm hoping to have the next chapter up much sooner, especially since these feel so short. 
> 
> Feel free to let me know what you thought! We're finally getting to the beginning of a bit of ~things happening~, though we've got another chapter or two before we get to the Malec and adult!Alec plot that most of us are here for. We've pretty much reached the end of the little snapshots from his childhood, though. Once the whole thing is done I might revisit the kids in some one-shots, but that won't be for a while.
> 
> Finally, thank you all again so much for the response to this story! You guys rock.


	5. Chapter 5

Alec staggered down the steps of the Institute and started walking aimlessly, unsure where to go but knowing he needed to get _away_ before he had a complete breakdown in front of his siblings. He was so absorbed in trying to understand what was happening that he nearly walked straight into another man on the sidewalk.

“Watch it, kid,” the man grumbled before doing a double take. “Isn’t it a little early for Halloween costumes?”

Alec blanched. “What are you talking about?”

The man gestured vaguely somewhere behind Alec, then caught sight of his watch and shrugged, hurrying away. Alec glanced around him and sure enough, the commuters who weren’t engrossed in their own thoughts or phones were giving Alec second glances.

“Oh, god,” Alec breathed. He activated his invisibility rune, knowing it wouldn’t work for long, and broke into a run towards Tessa’s. He wasn’t due for another glamour for months, so he wasn’t sure why it was wearing off now—he just knew it needed to be fixed, fast, before he ended up on some mundane news story, or worse.

He reached Tessa’s apartment and raised a fist to knock, only for the door to fly open and slam into the wall behind it before he’d had a chance to even touch it. He only hesitated for a moment before walking in, trying to catch his breath.

“Tessa?” he called, looking around for her and finding no one. He wasn’t sure if he should even be there—was Tessa in on the secret? Did _everyone_ know what he was besides him?—but he knew getting his glamour back up was too important to set aside.

“Tessa!” he yelled angrily. He’d looked through every room in the small apartment and it was clear the warlock wasn’t home, which meant he was stuck there until she arrived. Alec, fighting back tears and pulling at his hair, shouted wordlessly and slammed his fists into the wall in frustration. The lights flickered, and years of strange occurrences childishly explained away by ghosts suddenly had new meaning.

“No!” Alec shouted. He refused to accept what was happening. He’d never felt so _angry_ —at his parents, at Tessa, at himself—

“ _No!_ ” This time when his fists hit the wall it wasn’t just the lights flickering; the bulbs burst and rained glass onto the ground, windows shattered, and he could hear water hitting the ceiling from burst sink faucets in another room.

He managed to look around himself in horror before his vision went completely black.

 

Alec woke to a throbbing head and something tapping on his cheek. He groaned, opening his eyes slowly.

“Alec?” Tessa was crouched anxiously next to where he lay face down on the couch. “Oh, thank god, you scared me half to death. Do you know how it feels to come home to an unconscious teenager on your floor? It feels bad, Alec.”

He groaned again, sitting up to avoid both her lecture and her hands, which had been holding his head still to check for damage. He looked around, expecting to see the disaster he’d passed out in, but instead found Tessa’s home looking good as new.

“What happened? Was I—was it a dream?” He asked, not daring to hope.

Tessa sighed and stood, moving to sit across from him. “What happened is you had a temper tantrum and blew up my flat, knocking yourself out in the process. I hope you’re proud of yourself, because that was a right bitch to clean up.”

“A temper tantrum,” Alec repeated blankly. He seemed to have used up all the emotion he had, and now just sat quietly, stunned. Eventually, he asked, “Tessa, what am I?”

Tessa hesitated, but it was clear now that trying to ignore his emerging magic all these years was doing more harm than anything else. She could remember her own confusion and frustration when she’d gone through this herself, and she’d be damned if she continued to be complicit in the lies now that they could be sure he really did have magic.

“Have I ever told you what _I_ am, Alec?”

He squinted at her. “You’re a warlock.”

She gave him a small smile. “I am a warlock. I am also part Shadowhunter.”

Alec blinked. “You don’t have any runes.” He wondered where all his turbulent emotions had gone, and thought that maybe there was just nothing that could surprise him anymore after having his life turned upside down by a simple blood test.

“I don’t,” she agreed. “I can’t take any. We think the only reason I survived the birth at all is that my mother had never been runed either. It’s why I was asked specifically to watch over you, however. I am part demon, but also part Shadowhunter, resulting in a warlock with stunted magic and the ability to shapeshift,” she finished, gesturing to herself grandly, hoping to elicit some reaction out of the worryingly stony-faced boy in front of her.

“And that’s what I am?” he asked, swallowing. “Part Shadowhunter and part—” he broke off, pressing his trembling lips together and looking away.

“We’re actually not sure, Alec,” she said. “It seems you’re even more unique than I am. I was sired by a demon—other than my Shadowhunter mother, I am about as normal as a warlock can be. You, however, came from even more unusual circumstances.” She could see that he was getting upset, so she hurried to add, “Your father is Robert Lightwood, don’t worry about that. As long as what they’ve told us is true, you would have been born one hundred percent Shadowhunter had they not been part of the Circle when you were conceived.”

“Had they not been part of _what_?” Alec exclaimed. The numbness of shock seemed to disappear all at once.

Tessa winced. “Ah—I forgot you wouldn’t know. We’ll come back to that in a bit?” She cleared her throat and continued, wanting to get all of the revelations out of the way at once. “The leader of the Circle, Valentine, was trying to create a—a warrior, for lack of a better word, that would aid in his goal of wiping out all Downworlders. When she was pregnant, he gave your mother injections. We’re not sure what exactly he gave her, and your parents refuse to listen to reason, but we’re almost certain he was injecting her with demon blood.”

Alec shook his head and stood up. “You’re lying. My parents wouldn’t—they just _wouldn’t_ ,” he said, heading towards the door, trying not to let the question of ‘ _Would they?’_ invade his thoughts.

“Your wings, Alec,” Tessa called out before he could leave. He clenched his fists, almost relieved to have something different to be mad about.

“My wings!” he said loudly, turning to point accusingly at Tessa. “Why are my wings unglamoured? It should have lasted for months more. What did you do?”

“Me?” she said. “The glamour I cast was perfectly fine. I think what’s happening is that all that magic that’s been repressed for so long is finally breaking free, and you have no idea how to control it. It burned through the glamour trying to find an outlet, and when that wasn’t enough, it was released through your anger.”

Alec stared at her, trying to keep himself together. He wondered if things would start breaking again, but somehow knew he was too worn out. “Can’t control it? Whose fault is that, Tessa, I didn’t know it was there!”

“I know, Alec, and I’m sorry, really I am. It wasn’t right to keep it from you, but your parents were adamant, and, honestly, I think we were all hoping their ‘Angelic gift’ theory would be correct, for your sake.” She’d drawn nearer to Alec and placed a calming hand on his arm, which he shook off.

“My parents,” he bit out. “I can’t believe they would keep something like this from me.”

“If it makes you feel any better, I don’t think they meant to lie to you,” she said. “They won’t let _themselves_ see the truth, let alone tell you about it. When Magnus told them he sensed magic in you, they refused to believe him; thought he was either lying or mistaken.”

“Magnus?” Alec asked.

“Magnus Bane, High Warlock of Brooklyn,” Tessa said with a fond smile. “Well, usually. He’s on a travelling kick right now. I’m sure I’ve mentioned him before; he’s the one who told me about you.”

Alec shrugged. Add one more person to the list of people keeping life-changing secrets from him.

“So I guess this is the real reason I’m so bad at runes? There’s a silver lining, at least: I’m not a complete idiot, I just never should have been born!” he said with bitter, faux cheer.

“Oh, Alec, don’t be like that. I know it’s hard—I know your life has just been turned completely upside down—but hey, you get the best of both worlds, apparently. I can’t use runes at all, and my magic is nowhere near as powerful as most warlocks. You, however, get both runes and magic, _and_ , if that little display earlier was any indication, you won’t be lacking on the power front much, if at all.”

“Yay,” Alec replied, deadpan.

“Yay is right, sad-sack,” Tessa said. “If it really is as powerful as it seems, it could easily compensate for what your runes might be lacking. Think of what that could mean in battle, Mr. Shadowhunter.”

“Half Shadowhunter,” Alec said, but he seemed to be considering her words. “What if I don’t want it? What if I just—pretend I don’t know?” he asked, feeling like it might be his last resort.

Tessa shook her head sympathetically. “Then you bottle it up and it has nowhere to go until it escapes in any way it can. You saw what happened today—what if that had happened at home? When you were with your siblings?” She could see she’d hit a nerve. “What about this, Alec: I’ll teach you how to control your magic, how to let out the excess energy in a safe way, and after that you can do whatever you want with it. Use it in a hunt or never use it except to prevent outbursts, either way, just as long as you know how to keep yourself safe.”

Alec fidgeted restlessly, feeling trapped no matter what he did, but eventually he admitted to himself that his family’s safety was the most important factor.

“Fine,” he said. “Teach me magic.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully it's not super obvious that I've never actually read Tessa's books (though I've read her wiki extensively). 
> 
> Thank you all so much for your comments and kudos! Please feel free to let me know what you think, good or bad (although, if it's about Alec being an angsty teen, please understand that at this point in the story he is indeed an angsty teen, haha.)


	6. Chapter 6

“Hodge?” Alec asked, breaking the quiet in the library where the man in question had been working.

Hodge looked up distractedly and frowned, taking in Alec’s red-rimmed eyes and dour expression. “What’s up, Alec? Are you alright?”

Alec swallowed and set his jaw. “Did you know?” he asked. “What I am?”

Hodge’s eyes widened for just a moment before his expression smoothed. He slowly closed the books he had been reading and stacked them neatly before finally answering, “You’re going to have to elaborate, Alec. What do you mean?”

He huffed. “I mean did you _know_? Did you know about the demon blood? About all the lies, about the—the fucking _magic_?” His voice rose steadily with his growing anger and Hodge stood quickly, glancing around to be sure no one could overhear.

“Whoa, whoa—Slow down, Alec, what in the world are you talking about? Did you say _magic_?” He guided a reluctant Alec to a chair and crouched in front of him.

Alec looked at him intently for a moment before finally sighing and looking away, the earlier anger bleeding out of him. “You really don’t know?” he asked again in a small voice. Hodge continued to look lost as he shook his head, and Alec felt as if he could cry in relief; at least he still had one adult that hadn’t lied to him his entire life. He licked his lips, suddenly realizing that he was about to tell the only person he cared about that was still left in the dark about what an abomination he was.

“I—Ah… You know Tessa? The warlock who does my glamours?” he started, changing his mind along the way even as Hodge nodded in support. “Actually, I should start with—um—” He stumbled over his words, thanking the Angel for Hodge’s patience while he tried to string an explanation together that wouldn’t send his mentor running for the Clave.

“Alec,” Hodge interrupted. “Something happened today?” Alec nodded. “Then just start from the beginning,” he suggested. “Like a mission report.”

“A mission report…” Alec sat up straight and nodded once, trying to push away all of the tumultuous emotions that had been threatening to drown him ever since their seemingly innocent science experiment. “Izzy was doing some lab practices and we discovered that I have—demon blood.” Alec was proud when his composure only slipped a bit.

“We?” questioned Hodge.

“Izzy, Jace, and me.” Hodge nodded once and motioned for Alec to continue. “I was upset, and I left. I realized that my wings were visible even though it wasn’t time to renew the glamour, so I went to Tessa. I had… an accident.” Alec faltered once more before hurrying through the rest, afraid of being interrupted. “I blew up half of Tessa’s apartment and passed out. When I woke up she told me I had magic and it was draining the glamour and if I keep the magic in so much I might hurt Izzy or Jace or—” he cut himself off and finished with a panic he didn’t realize he still carried. “And she wants me to take magic lessons from her!”

The ensuing silence almost felt worse than realizing his whole life was a lie; at least that he knew for sure. Not knowing how Hodge would react was killing him. The man patted Alec absently on the arm before moving to sit back in his own chair across from him.

After another agonizing moment of contemplation, Hodge said, “That’s a lot to have dumped on you in one day, Alec. I’m proud of you for handling it so well, and for trusting me with it.”

Alec flushed with the unexpected praise. “Figured you should know since you’re probably the only one who doesn’t, now.”

“Your parents know about the magic?”

“Not the magic, specifically, though I bet they’ve guessed,” Alec muttered. “I mean more the fact that I never had any _gifts_ from the Angel to speak of— _demon blood_ , Hodge! I might as well be a Downworlder, but I can’t even get that right. They let me believe my whole life that my wings meant I was special, that I was a—a _warrior_ or whatever—but I’m just a freak, and they knew it!”

“Hey,” Hodge interrupted, “you’re not a freak, Alec.” Alec scoffed. “Stop it. So your parents got some of this wrong—I don’t think they’ve been lying to you. I know them, Alec, I know they truly believe you have these gifts for a good reason, even if they were mistaken about the source.” He paused. “How about this; for now, don’t mention the blood or the magic to your parents. I think it will take them some time to get used to the idea that you might have some warlock magic—” Alec winced. “—But perhaps telling them once you have full control over it would soften the surprise.”

Alec hesitantly nodded in agreement. “So, you think I should let Tessa teach me?”

“Knowledge is power, Alec. And I don’t want anyone to be able to use this to take advantage of you,” Hodge said seriously, idly rubbing one of his rings.

 

Alec sighed, turning to a new page before he groaned and dropped his head onto his arms on the table, only lifting it again so he could glare at Tessa, who had begun snickering quietly.

“Tell me again why you can’t just, you know, _teach me magic_?” Alec grumbled.

Still smiling softly, she said, “Just like anything else, learning magic is easier with a solid theoretical foundation.”

“We didn’t read anything before we learned to fight,” he argued.

“But you studied for years before being allowed to first use your runes, correct?” Alec nodded reluctantly. “Magic lies somewhere in the middle. Yes, it’s possible to skip the theory and jump straight into using your magic—it’s what I had to do, and we’ll start some of that very soon, actually; there are mental muscles of a sort that you will need to start strengthening in order to have any sort of control over it, which will be important to prevent more outbursts. However, just like your runes, there are magical words of power that can be drawn on for spells. There are ingredients you’ve never heard of that can be used for any kind of potion you can imagine, even different ways to draw power from outside sources. Most warlocks learn this stuff throughout their lives through their own experiences and apprenticeships with other warlocks, but you have the advantage of time and already being under my care. That means we can take advantage of the library in the Spiral Labyrinth, and maybe some books that have been spelled with better memory retention,” she finished with a wink.

“I guess,” he allowed, grimacing as he turned back to his assigned reading. Alec liked to read, and he especially liked to learn; in any other situation he would have been in heaven being allowed to read books like this without interruption. He was, however, worried that his up-and-down emotions were a time bomb towards someone getting hurt. What if Tessa had been home when he’d exploded before? She could have been hit with shards of glass, or the sink faucet, or any of the other things he had magically dislodged. What if he was at home next time and hurt Izzy or Jace?

“Alright.” Alec jumped at Tessa’s voice and the decisive clap of her hands. “Clearly you’re too broody right now to get much more out of that book anyway. Put that away and come over here with me and we’ll get to some of that practical learning you’re so excited about,” she said as she headed to the middle of her living room where there was a fairly large empty space.

He stood up and hesitated, suddenly apprehensive. Did he really want to have proof he could do this? Proof he was essentially an unholy Downworlder-Shadowhunter half-breed? He could rationalize away the earlier outburst of power if he tried hard enough, but now… Maybe theory was safer.

He flushed, ashamed at his thoughts as he watched Tessa arrange the furniture to give them even more space. Maybe she had kept this from him, but so had his parents. Tessa had never been anything but kind and helpful and patient with him, even when he was acting like a jerk. Hell, the history lessons had been her idea—she could have easily sent him away and ignored him other than his yearly glamour sessions. Maybe _he_ was a freak, but he didn’t think Tessa should be dragged into that definition just because she was unlucky enough to be part—well, he wasn’t sure anymore if being part Shadowhunter or part warlock was the unlucky bit.

“Hey, walking teenage angst machine—are you ready or are you just going to stand there and emote all over my carpet?”

Alec spluttered indignantly, unable to formulate a response other than thinking, _Never mind, she’s the worst_.

 

He smiled slightly as he walked home a few hours later, books in his arms. Tessa had sat him down on the floor of her apartment and had him meditate until he “found his magic.” He’d been frustrated and almost wished he could go back to studying the textbooks, but she insisted it was necessary for him to start gaining control of himself.

“You can’t just _will_ something to happen with your mind—I mean, you _can_ , but not _just_ your mind. This isn’t telekinesis from a movie, there has to be power behind the will, and to access that power you have to know where it is.”

So he’d grumbled and concentrated and they’d gone back and forth with impatience and explanations before he had finally, _finally_ , found it.

He hadn’t expected to feel like this. He thought magic should feel dirty, foreign… _wrong_. Instead, he walked towards the Institute feeling as if he had woken up from a sixteen-year long dream. Once he had found his magic it had flowed through him, nearly overwhelming him until Tessa reminded him of the basics of reigning it in, both of them surprised at the extent of it. He’d been tasked with more readings and some light—very light—practical magic exercises to do alone.

His body thrummed with his magic. He felt _alive_.

 

That feeling was stifled when he walked into the Institute. Tessa had reglamoured his wings before he left, but he felt so different he was surprised no one was staring at him. He hurried to his room to hide his books away, and was almost there when he stumbled to a stop as he spotted Jace down the hall.

They both slowed to a stop when they reached each other, but neither wanted to speak first.

“Hey,” Jace finally said, rubbing the back of his head awkwardly. “Where’ve you been all day? We’ve been worried about you since you ran off yesterday, but Hodge said to leave you alone.”

“Tessa’s. She, ah, gave me some books. Said she’d help me learn to—” He cut himself off, unsure how open Jace would be to knowing how far into his new magic he’d delved today.

“Oh. That’s—good? Right?” Jace asked.

Alec nodded. “Listen, Jace—I promise I’m not—I’m still the same, you know? I’m still the same as I was, now we just know more about how I was—um—made? Or whatever, but my point, I guess, is that I’m not, like, super dangerous, or—” He stopped, unable to look up to see how Jace was reacting to his stumbling pleading.

“Alec—” Jace put his hand on his shoulder. “Hey, come on, is that what you’ve been thinking? That Izzy and I will just start hating you all of a sudden?” Alec looked up hesitantly and Jace laughed in relief and punched him gently on the shoulder. “Dude, we’re _parabatai_. It’s going to take more than that to break us up.”

Alec sagged in relief, falling into the hug Jace offered. Jace, Izzy, Tessa, even Hodge… With so many people in his corner, maybe he could handle all of this after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My deepest apologies for this unexpected hiatus. Everything seems to be back on track, so hopefully we can get back to semi-weekly updates? Let's hope. As always, please let me know what you thought. I'm so incredibly grateful for the continued support this story has gotten even while I was away dealing with the real world. You guys are the best!


	7. Chapter 7

Learning to wield and control his magic was both harder and more time consuming than Alec had anticipated. He hadn’t expected to become proficient overnight, but the snail’s pace he felt he was moving at seemed tedious. Eventually he realized Tessa was right; it had taken him years of dedicated training to get where he was as a Shadowhunter, and his path to mastering these new talents would be no different.

Alec’s magic was volatile and almost impossible to control at first. Tessa resorted to portalling them to empty fields for their lessons just so he’d stop accidentally setting her furniture on fire out of frustration. She also had to increase the power she put into his glamours, as all of this explosive new magic seemed to be burning through her charms at a rapid pace, forcing her to admit that there were still some things about magic that even she didn’t know, and they’d just have to work even harder at getting control of his magical outbursts so that he could create glamours on his own when she wasn’t around to reapply them.

Coupled with the already draining magic lessons, Hodge had begun pushing him harder than ever in the Institute’s training room, allowing no room for small errors that he usually let slide, and leaving Alec exhausted every day. It was only after he collapsed during a sparring session that Hodge considered easing up on their regimen, which made Alec’s life bearable again, though he would have preferred the fatigue over Hodge’s disappointment.

When he wasn’t training in magic or combat, he was being drilled by his parents on the best practices of running an Institute. They were leaving on another series of assignments in Idris, and now that he was of age the responsibility of Interim Head would go to him.

He got little respite at night; even his dreams were filled with enchantments, battle strategies, and outlandish practice scenarios even his parents wouldn’t have come up with.

It all came to a head when Jace walked in on Alec sleeping on a pile of paperwork for the third time in one week. After half carrying him to bed and making him rest, he and Izzy demanded he let them help, despite the fact that they were still too young in the Clave’s eyes to be allowed to take part in running an Institute. Even their parents had never run the place alone, they argued, and certainly not with the extra training on top. Plus, they missed him. The three of them hardly ever saw each other anymore except for group training. When they threatened to go to Hodge and Tessa to make them ease up on him, he finally relented; despite his dubious status due to his demon blood, his parents still expected him to be the best, and he refused to let them or any of his tutors know how weak he was.

And so the years passed. Izzy and Jace became something between assistants and co-Heads of the Institute, helping with the workload in any way they could while continuing to train together. They soon gained a reputation as three of the most promising Shadowhunters of their generation. Alec slowly gained more control over his powers and eventually began to combine them with his combat training, imbuing his arrows with power even runes couldn’t provide and learning to produce concussive blasts from nothing in the event that his weapons were unavailable. Surprising both himself and Tessa, who had assumed his magical powers would be weaker than the common warlock’s to mirror his weak runes, he seemed to have more than enough power to compensate.

 _Soon_ , Alec thought. _Soon I’ll be perfect and Mother will have to be proud, despite what I am…_

 

One warm morning shortly after he turned twenty, Alec stood in front of his bathroom mirror, hardly able to recognize himself. He was no longer a gangly sixteen-year-old, awkward even without the addition of wings. He stood tall with the confidence that came from running the Institute for years in all but name, having slowly gained the respect of the New York Shadowhunters despite his initial shyness. His body had become more evenly proportioned as he grew into his height and filled out with lean muscle, and he was covered in scars and runes both active and used up—something a Shadowhunter could be proud of.

His wings had grown as well. Diligently keeping them well-groomed and oiled over the years had rewarded him with long, healthy feathers that looked black as night until they caught the light, reflecting a dark, iridescent blue. They molted yearly, shedding and regrowing, each time resulting in longer, stronger feathers. They reached almost to the floor when folded close to his back, and his full wingspan could reach from wall to wall in all but the largest rooms of the Institute. Combining both runes and magic, he had begun glamouring his whole body early on and took regular flights to strengthen his wings and practice aerial maneuvers. Making his own accommodations, such as removing the back of a chair or altering his clothes, took no more effort than a flick of his fingers and a little concentration.

He still wasn’t sure exactly _what_ he was—Downworlder, Shadowhunter, or something even more _other_ —but he could finally see a glimpse of the warrior his parents expected him to become.

Of course, nothing could be perfect. While he had a strong grasp on his magic, it was abnormally strong, according to Tessa, and he still had the occasional mishap when his emotions got the best of him, reinforcing his parents’ adage of emotions being nothing but distractions.

Shaking off his introspective mood, Alec mentally ran through the week’s schedule, relieved that it would be mostly routine, and glad they had finally caught a lead on the elusive demon they’d been tracking for weeks. He, Izzy, and Jace would hopefully be concluding that mission tonight.

He considered skipping his session with Tessa this afternoon in order to better prepare for their attack. She had recently admitted that they had reached the point where there wasn’t much left for her to teach him, so it would likely just be practice he could easily do at home. He still had much to learn, but it was going to have to come from books and other, more experienced warlocks.

Alec was brought out of his thoughts when he heard his phone ping from his nightstand. He checked the message and saw with relief that the decision had been made for him; Tessa had cancelled their afternoon session due to Magnus Bane’s spontaneous return, letting Alec know that she wanted to catch up with the warlock in person, though she relayed that Alec was invited to Magnus’ return party later that night.

Alec felt a thrill of nerves flow through him; for years he had only heard stories of the powerful High Warlock, and the prospect of meeting him made Alec both scared and excited. Magnus was Tessa’s friend, and that combined with his power made him the top choice to continue Alec’s training, but he was afraid of how the man would react to Alec’s strange circumstances without the buffer Tessa’s shared blood and experiences allowed them.

Either way, they would not meet tonight. Alec sent back a polite message declining the offer; they couldn’t afford to miss the chance at finally sending this demon back to Edom just to attend a party.

 

Somehow, none of their briefings had mentioned the fact that the High Warlock of Brooklyn owned the very nightclub they were stalking their target into. Alec could sense Tessa’s magic the moment he stepped inside the pulsing building, along with a host of other warlocks he’d never met before, and he could see the place was packed with Downworlders and mundanes alike gyrating under the strobe lights. How many were there for the party he couldn’t be sure, but it was obvious that Pandemonium was the place to be that night.

He felt his pocket vibrate as he followed Jace to the bar so that Izzy could work her own brand of magic on the demon on the dance floor, and he knew that Tessa had felt him enter as well. He spared a moment to text her back so she’d know not to approach him in the middle of a mission, then locked his eyes on his sister as diligently as he could while remaining inconspicuous.

His lookout was broken when Jace nudged his arm and nodded toward the upper balcony that overlooked the dance floor.

“I think you’ve got yourself an admirer, dude,” he snickered.

Alec frowned in confusion and looked up. He saw Tessa almost right away, her familiar face and magic both making her stand out to him. At first he thought Jace was making some joke, but Tessa wasn’t looking at him. The man she was talking to, however, was staring at him like there was no one else of importance in the whole building, idling stirring a cocktail and responding to Tessa without averting his gaze.

Alec’s breath caught, and he found himself unable to look away, locked in a staring contest with the other man. He thought it might be magic—he could feel that the man was powerful, maybe even the most powerful warlock present—but he dismissed the thought almost immediately. He felt no spells being placed anywhere near him, and being honest with himself, the man was simply stunning; everything about him told of elegance and extravagance.

He jerked back to reality when Jace nudged him once more.

“Sorry, man, duty calls.”

Alec cleared his throat and tried to will away the blush he knew was overtaking his face as he followed Jace toward the back of the building. He risked one more glance up and shivered as the man met his eyes once again, winked, and finally turned away. Alec mumbled a rushed apology when he stumbled into a group and hurried to catch up with Jace.

 

Once cornered, the demon they’d been hunting for weeks was almost disappointingly easy to kill if he ignored the mundane with the Sight that had interrupted them. Since they weren’t technically on patrol, checking in once they were done wasn’t an immediate necessity. Giving in to his siblings’ pleading looks, he told them that once they’d dealt with the mundane they were free to enjoy the rest of the night. A quick rock-paper-scissors game ended with Izzy heading towards the dance floor, Jace talking the mundane and her friend down from hysterics, and Alec on his way up the stairs to the upper floor, hoping to run into Tessa and—though he was loath to admit it, even to himself—hoping to catch another glimpse of her friend.

He didn’t have to look far. He found them sitting, talking together on a small couch that managed to seem secluded even in the midst of the crowd. Tessa noticed him first, and the man followed her gaze and stood, smiling as he gracefully made his way to Alec.

“Well, hello there,” the man said lowly, his eyes looking Alec up and down. He seemed pleased with what he saw. “Normally I try to discourage fighting in my places of business, but if you’re the one to take care of it I might just have to start some fights myself.”

“Um.” Alec thought he might actually burst into flames when that was all he managed to get out as a greeting, though the man seemed to find it amusing.

“Alec!” Tessa said. “I’m glad you could make it, even if it was technically for work. This is Magnus. Magnus, this is Alec Lightwood.”

Instead of the disgust or fear that usually followed his last name on the few times he’d introduced himself to Downworlders, Magnus’ eyes widened just a bit, flicking quickly to his wings and back, before he smiled again.

“Alexander… My, my, you’ve certainly grown up since the last time I saw you,” he said.

Tessa frowned. “Down, Magnus,” she said. “He’s a kid.”

“I’m really, _really_ not,” Alec blurted, wondering if it was possible to banish himself to Edom as well, since he was sure he’d make less of a fool of himself there.

Magnus smiled even wider.

Alec thought he must have done something very bad in a past life, because that was the moment Izzy ran up to him and told him they needed to get the mundane, who had somehow managed to get hit with the demon’s poison, to the Institute as soon as possible.

“Duty calls, I see,” Magnus said a tad dramatically. “Tessa mentioned that you need a new tutor,” he said, brightening. As he spoke, he slowly stepped closer to Alec until they were nearly chest to chest. “Perhaps,” he continued, Alec’s breath catching once again as Magnus slid his hand into Alec’s pocket and removed his phone, “I should give you my number so that we can arrange a proper meeting? Preferably over dinner?”

“Um.” Alec forced himself to make actual words come out of his mouth. “Yes. That would—I mean, I’d like to, ah—” By the time he’d gotten that much out, Magnus had finished typing on his phone and slid it back into Alec’s pocket, causing Alec’s stuttering to cut off with an undignified squeak.

Izzy finally took pity on him and said, “He will _definitely_ be calling you, but we really do need to go!” as she dragged him through the crowd toward the stairs. Alec looked back just once and saw Tessa scolding an uncaring Magnus who seemed just as unwilling to look away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HE'S BACK! Half the comments on this story are about Magnus and when he's going to appear, and here he finally is. I really didn't want Magnus to know Alec as a teenager or child; when you're as old as he is, I think it would be hard to see Alec as anything other than a kid, even at 20, unless he specifically met him as a grown man. Hence the weird, random travelling kick. It might be just me, but I like it better like this.
> 
> As always, thank you so much for your kind words and supporting this story! Please feel free to let me know what you thought, good or bad.


	8. Chapter 8

Alec frowned as he exited the infirmary and looked expectantly at Jace, crossing his arms. Jace had the decency to look at least a tiny bit repentant behind his rising defenses, but just barely.

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” Jace said. “She’s fine.”

“How about what the hell you were thinking, Jace?” Alec said. “She’s fine because you got _extremely_ lucky. You _know_ what could have happened to her—you’ve seen the Forsaken, you know there’s a chance when you rune a mundane—”

“The poison was spreading, Alec, what should I have done? Let her die on the way to the Institute when I could apply a rune right there? She had the sight, _you_ know that raises the chances—”

“How about ask for help from any of the many, _many_ warlocks in that club?” Alec demanded.

Jace’s jaw clicked shut, but he recovered quickly. “How was I supposed to know how many warlocks were in there?”

“I know you saw Tessa, and there were several that were obvious from their marks if you had been utilizing a modicum of your training, not to mention _me_ —”

“Hey! I’m not some trainee, Alec, so don’t talk to me like I am. Maybe I didn’t make the most logical decision but it doesn’t mean it was a bad one. Everything still turned out alright. What are you going to do, punish me?”

Alec’s frown deepened. They both knew Alec wouldn’t punish Jace, not officially, anyway; as far as the New York Institute was concerned, they, along with Izzy, were pretty much equals, and punishing either one of his siblings would just undermine that. He didn’t think Jace would learn much from something like ichor duty anyway. It didn’t change the fact that Jace had acted recklessly, though, and he needed to know that it wasn’t okay.

 “You know I won’t,” Alec said, noticing Jace’s posture relaxing. “But you need to learn that these rash decisions you love making have consequences, and I don’t know how to get that through to you,” he admitted.

Jace rolled his eyes. “Come on. Maybe I’m a little… _hasty_ sometimes, but it’s never gotten us into too much trouble, has it?” He grinned confidently and said, “Hey, sometimes it even helps. Remember that time in the run-down gas station?”

“I try to forget,” Alec said drily. There was a quiet pause, and then Alec finally said, “Here’s what we’re going to do. When the mundane wakes up—”

“Clary.”

“Excuse me?”

“Her name,” Jace said, looking at a spot on the wall just to the left of Alec’s eyes; his only tell. Alec always figured he was just too brazen to blush when he was embarrassed.

“Oh, come on, Jace!” Alec said. “This is what I’m talking about. Instead of using your head to figure out a way to get her to help, you were too busy getting her number!”

“Hey! Did I say I got her number? She just told me her name!”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Alec said. “Did she pass out from the demon venom before you could seal the deal?”

“You know what?” Jace began, but was cut off by the infirmary door opening and a severe-looking nurse glaring at them until they looked suitably cowed. Once she was satisfied they would stay quiet she shut the door again, leaving them alone in the hallway.

“Look,” Alec said, “She’s going to wake up, _runed_ , and have no idea what it means. She’ll have questions that we’re duty-bound to answer since we’re the ones that brought it upon her. That’s officially your job. Once you explain what we are—what she is—give her a choice; either escort her safely home and let her forget all about us, or get her started on a basic training regimen. Either way, she’s your problem. Got it?”

Jace rolled his eyes, but nodded, knowing that unless he wanted to resume arguing then this was the best option he had.

“Got it,” he said, brushing by Alec to return to the infirmary and wait for the girl to wake up.

It was only years of diligent training that kept Alec from jumping when he turned to leave and found himself face to face with his sister.

“That was quite the reprimanding, big brother,” she said cheerily.

Alec narrowed his eyes, unsure if he was being made fun of.

“If he continues acting without thinking things through he’s going to get someone hurt—or worse. It almost happened tonight. I just want to prevent it,” he said finally. “For his sake as well.”

“I get it,” Izzy said, still looking disturbingly eager.

“What do you want?”

She grinned. “Can I borrow your phone?”

“What’s wrong with yours?” he asked.

“I can’t find it. Must have misplaced it during the fight.”

“Izzy, I can see the outline of it in your pocket.”

She blinked innocently. “Oh, silly me. I have it, it’s just dead. Can I borrow yours?”

He side-eyed her harder.

“No.”

“Please? It’ll be quick,” she said, darting her hand toward his pocket and making a grab for it anyway.

“What are you doing?” he grunted, batting her hands away. Unsurprisingly, having someone else’s hand in his pants pocket was far less interesting when it was his sister rather than the hottest—

“Got it!” she crowed, but Alec was quicker and snatched it back just before she squirmed out of his reach.

“What the hell are you doing, Izzy?” Alec demanded while she pouted.

“I just wanted to see what _Magnus Bane_ put as his contact in your phone,” she said, wiggling her eyebrows.

Alec stared at her. “I would imagine he put his _name_.”

“That’s so boring, though,” she said as if she was making complete sense, while Alec felt like they were on two different planets. “Haven’t you texted him yet?”

That threw Alec in another direction completely. “I—should I?” he asked. “We practically just got back. I thought there was some… three-day waiting rule or something?”

Izzy looked at him fondly. “Alec, this isn’t some mundane high school TV show. You can text him whenever you want. You’re two grown men.” When he just grimaced in response, she said, “Just tell him you got home safe or something. Start a conversation.”

“Got home _safe_?” he asked. “We’re _Shadowhunters_ , isn’t that kind of a given? Now who’s basing their knowledge on corny TV?”

She rolled her eyes. “Look, I don’t know, I figured you’d want a more subtle approach than I usually use. You could always just ask when he wants to get dinner or something.”

“Is that too direct, though?” he asked. He felt like he was completely out of his element, and all over some stupid text he hadn’t even sent yet. How in the world was he supposed to interact with the man in person?

“Alec, direct is ‘my place or yours,’ not finalizing dinner plans that have already been mentioned.”

Sighing, Alec rubbed his eyes and grumbled something indistinct before bringing up Magnus’s contact in his phone and quickly typing in, _Would you like to get dinner tomorrow night?_ He hesitated just long enough before hitting send for Izzy’s finger to appear and press the button for him.

“ _Izzy!_ ”

“You were taking too long, and now it’s done. Doesn’t it feel better now?”

“No,” he said dourly, but it felt like a lie.

Later, as he finished up the night’s paperwork in his office, his phone buzzed on his desk. He checked the screen and hid a smile, though no one was there to see it. He, Alec Lightwood, had a date.

 

His good mood was not as lasting as he’d hoped. Around dawn he was woken by a call from Jace, who had taken the mundane— _Clary_ —home once she woke up and asked for time to think about things. Apparently, they’d gotten to her apartment only to find it completely bare and her mother missing, a feat which Clary insisted should have been impossible in the time she’d been gone. Alec agreed to meet them there to examine the place more closely to hopefully catch wind of any leftover magic, waking Izzy and leaving the Institute in her capable hands.

Alec landed on the sidewalk in front of the apartment building and headed towards it, intending to circle around and enter from the back where he assumed the actual apartment entrance was; the front of the building only opened to an antique store. As he approached the corner, however, he noticed that several of the wares in the dark store had seemingly been thrown carelessly around, and many were broken. Figuring Jace could handle an empty apartment for a few more minutes, Alec went to the large shop window and peered in.

He saw movement just as he was about to turn away. Still glamoured from his flight, Alec applied two runes to the door: one for silence and one to unlock it. He slipped in, hoping whatever he had seen wouldn’t notice the door moving briefly.

As he crept through the shop he heard a scuffling sound from his right. He paused and gripped his blade, listening to determine the exact location, then leapt into the air, pulling the blade as he glided over several tall piles of antiques haphazardly heaped on every surface, and landed next to a crouched woman, quickly placing his blade to her throat and releasing his glamour.

The woman let out a shout of surprise and fear when Alec and his weapon appeared to her, but wisely didn’t try to move too far.

“Please,” she said, tears in her voice. By the scant light of dawn and his glowing blade Alec could see that she was injured, hair bloodied and eyes unfocused. “I told you, I don’t have it, I swear—”

“Hey,” Alec said lowly, lowering his blade but not putting it away. He tried to make himself seem less threatening without leaving himself defenseless if it was a trick. “What don’t you have? What were they looking for?”

The woman swayed, meeting his eyes only briefly before whispering, “The _cup_ …,” and slowly falling the rest of the way to the floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I'm cursed. Any time I even start to think "reasonable posting schedule" my workload doubles and I can't get time to write. Therefore I will say nothing and hope for the best for future updates. We'll see. Thank you all, as always, for your awesome responses and comments, and please feel free to let me know what you thought, good or bad!


	9. Chapter 9

“Oh my god, Dot!”

Alec looked up from the woman on the floor—Dot, apparently—as Jace and Clary burst through the back of the antique shop, Clary rushing to kneel next to her.

“What happened to you two?” Alec asked, eyeing the numerous scratches and bruises already fading from Jace’s skin. He’d heard crashing coming from upstairs, but the woman’s injuries had been bad enough that he couldn’t leave her until he had healed her enough, which was proving to be something of an issue. He refocused his attention on the slowly closing wound on her side, but he wasn’t sure it would be enough.

“Forsaken,” Jace said with a grimace.

Alec raised his eyebrows. “You took out a Forsaken by yourself?”

Jace shrugged. “It was sort of—I don’t know how you can half-ass creating a Forsaken, but it just seemed… not right, somehow. It wasn’t as strong as it should have been. Not that I’m complaining. Plus,” he continued with a slightly dopey grin, “Clary helped.”

Alec would have rolled his eyes at his idiot brother, but he found he didn’t quite have the energy. It was like the woman’s wound was just sucking up his magic and only using a small portion of it to actually heal. Even more strange, however, was the ‘aura’ of the wound, for lack of a better word. Physically, it was what one would expect from something that size; a lot of blood, and that’s about it. Magically though… Alec shuddered and swallowed down a wave of nausea.

 “Clary,” he bit out, “take the cloth off that table over there and come put pressure on this. Jace, when she’s ready I’m going to need your strength; we need a portal to Tessa’s, but this is taking too much out of me.”

Jace nodded and put his hand on Alec’s shoulder while Clary grabbed the cloth. Once they were ready, Alec closed his eyes and ended the healing magic he’d been using on Dot—feeling guilty for the relief of being away from whatever strangeness had taken root inside her—hoping she would last long enough without it to get her transported. Instead, he focused on drawing a steady, controlled stream of energy from Jace into himself.

“Okay,” Alec said quietly, and the three of them moved at once. Jace removed his hand and bent to lift the woman off the floor while Clary tried to keep up constant pressure on the wound throughout the movement, and Alec stood, raised his arms, and opened a portal a few feet in front of them. At his nod, Clary and Jace went through first with Alec bringing up the rear.

Because of her wards, the four of them arrived just outside Tessa’s front door. His borrowed energy flagging, Alec stumbled forward and banged on her door, almost falling inside when it was opened roughly a minute later, a grumpy Tessa glaring out at her uninvited guests. When she saw the state they were in, however, she motioned for them to come inside quickly.

Jace rushed to place the woman on Tessa’s couch while Alec explained what happened.

“Something inhuman definitely created the wound,” he was saying as Tessa looked her over, “it sapped my magic way more quickly than it should have, and I was hardly able to heal her at all. A wound that size would normally be a piece of cake. And there’s something… _bad_ about it, but I can’t figure it out.”

Tessa hummed pensively as she moved her hand over the bloody mess. After a moment her face darkened and she shook her head.

“I’m going to call Magnus. She’s fading fast and you’re right; we’re going to have to counter whatever is affecting the healing magic before it will start working properly, and Magnus will be the fastest at figuring that out.” She stood quickly and had Clary apply pressure once again as she moved toward her bedroom, and presumably her phone.

Alec had just sagged into a chair when there came a sharp knock on the door and Tessa reentered the room.

“That was quick,” Clary said.

Alec nodded and mumbled, “I love portals,” earning a concerned look as Jace moved to open the door.

Magnus strode in and immediately headed for the couch, doing a double-take at the sight of Clary, and then pausing very briefly on his way to glance over Alec. Satisfied that he was just drained, Magnus patted his arm and said, “I think you’re going to need a nap before dinner, dear.”

Alec gave him a sleepy smile he would be embarrassed about when he had the energy later, though he thought Magnus’ fond look in response probably made it worth it.

Magnus sighed as he knelt by the sofa. “What in the world have you gotten into, Dot?”

Much like Tessa had, he moved his hands over Dot’s torso, trying to determine the best course of action. He eventually frowned to himself and sent Tessa out to collect some items from his loft as he began working a counter-spell.

When she got back, Jace and Clary helped when they could and stayed out of the way when they couldn’t, watching as the two warlocks worked together to get Dot stabilized.

During a particularly useless moment, Jace turned to Clary and frowned at the look on her face.

“What’s wrong?” he asked. “Other than the obvious.”

Clary frowned. “I swear I’ve seen him before, I just can’t put my finger on when. It’s bugging me.”

Before he could answer—though he hadn’t yet figured out what to say to that—they were called over once again to mix together the contents of several very suspect-looking jars and the conversation was forgotten in lieu of more pressing matters.

Nearly half an hour later both warlocks sat back, Magnus heaving another sigh and Tessa rubbing her eyes.

“Is it done?” Clary asked with fear in her voice; Dot still hadn’t moved so much as an inch since she’d been laid out on the couch. “Is she okay?”

“She will be soon, after some rest,” Magnus answered, standing and offering a hand up to Tessa. “Whatever did this to her was very dark, and very— _unique_ , to say the least. She was hit with magic, that I know for sure, but I don’t think I have ever seen a magical wound that _exuded_ maliciousness like this. It’s worrying.”

“That’s a bit of an understatement,” Tessa said, looking a little green.

Magnus hummed in agreement and turned his attention to Alec, who had been moved to a worn, backless sofa Tessa had acquired years ago to accommodate his wings. He’d fallen asleep at some point and curled up halfway between being on his side and his stomach so his feet didn’t hang off the end, one wing tucked up against his body, but the other had started to droop towards the floor.

“Now _that_ looks like a good idea,” Magnus said, obviously referring to Alec’s unconscious state, though somehow he’d managed to retain enough innuendo in his tone to make Jace wonder if he should be impressed or grossed out. “I’m going to take a little catnap myself while we wait for Dot to wake and explain what happened. It could be hours, so I suggest you kids either do the same, or find a good book.” He said a quick goodbye to Tessa and swept out the door, waving a hand loosely behind himself to magically collect the tools and ingredients that were strewn about the room.

Jace thought sleep sounded pretty great; he hadn’t slept since before the mission at Pandemonium, and he’d prefer actual rest to a stamina rune. Before he could suggest this to Clary, though, she had already turned to Tessa.

“Jace said Magnus just got back from years of travelling abroad,” Clary began. After a nod from Tessa, she asked, “So why do I feel like I’ve met him before? Maybe even more than once?”

Tessa shrugged. “You’d have to ask him, but it’s not like he completely abandoned his position. You don’t keep the title of Head Warlock without having some semblance of a presence in your territory,” she said. “He has a few warlocks he trusts with most issues, but when we needed someone stronger or more experienced, Magnus was always willing to portal back for a day or two. Maybe you bumped into him somewhere during one of those times; he’s certainly an eye-catcher.”

Clary didn’t look convinced, but let the subject drop. Tessa took the opportunity to excuse herself to her bedroom, offering them the guest room as she left.

“You wanna get some rest?” Jace asked. “It looks like it’ll be a while before we get any answers about your mom.” Seeing the look on her face, he hurried to say, “I know it feels like we’re twiddling our thumbs, but you won’t be any help to her if you’re asleep on your feet.”

He could see her resolve waver until her phone buzzed. She pulled it out and cursed.

“You can sleep, but I need to deal with this,” she said, walking past him to the door.

Jace frowned and followed. “What’s wrong? These people might still be after whatever your mom had, you won’t be safe out there alone.”

“Well I can’t just tell my mom’s supposedly platonic soulmate that she’s been kidnapped over the phone, now can I?” Clary said, voice tripping over the word ‘kidnapped’ before strengthening.

Jace didn’t see why not, but he just sighed and checked that he still had his gear on him and followed her out the door. He’d only known her for one very long night so far, but he already knew he’d be wasting his breath arguing, even if dealing with mundanes should be the lowest blip on their radars at the moment. He kissed the thought of sleep goodbye and applied a stamina rune as Clary hailed a cab.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since this is fanfic and loosely follows the start of the show/book, there will be some plot elements that you've seen over and over and over, like Forsaken at Clary's apartment and Valentine looking for the cup. I know that can get tedious, so I try to do it as little as possible. I will say that Val has some different motivation this time around, so there will be significant changes there, and the Malec stuff should be primarily my own. Let me know if any of it starts getting boring.
> 
> And as always, feel free to let me know what you thought of the chapter, good or bad.


	10. Chapter 10

Alec woke slowly, achy with what Tessa liked to call a ‘magic hangover.’ He’d definitely overdone it last night—or was it last night? He didn’t actually remember much of what had happened to make him expend so much energy. Hadn’t it been early morning? With a jolt of adrenaline he realized that he had no idea where he even was and he sat up quickly, snapping his eyes open and startling the source of the low murmur he had assumed was part of his headache.

On the couch across the room, Magnus pressed a hand to his chest and said, “Good heavens, Alexander, I do _not_ need a heart attack today.”

“ _You_?” Dot asked weakly, sitting up slowly. Magnus winced and patted her arm apologetically.

“Sorry.” Alec cleared his throat awkwardly. He had relaxed once he realized he was in a familiar place with—mostly—familiar people, but seeing Dot awake brought everything rushing back, even if it was still fuzzy. “And, um, sorry for scaring you back in that shop. Are you feeling okay?”

Dot grimaced and put a hand to her stomach. “A little sore, and I feel like I could sleep for another week, but I think I’m alright,” she said.

“You’re right on time,” Magnus said to Alec. “Dot was just telling me what she can remember of the attack. It’s—troubling, to say the least.”

Dot took a steadying breath and summarized for Alec, quickly catching up to where she and Magnus had left off. “I was getting ready to open up the shop when I heard yelling upstairs. I didn’t get there in time. Two men— _Circle_ members—were carrying Jocelyn through a portal while the others ransacked the place.” She looked at Magnus. “It looked like she had taken the potion.”

Magnus grimaced.

“Potion?” Alec asked.

“Jocelyn Fairchild—your new friend Clary’s mother—was Valentine’s wife,” Magnus said. He gave Alec a look to stifle any immediate questions and continued. “After she betrayed him during the Uprising she was afraid he would come back for her, so she commissioned a potion that would render her unconscious; she has… sensitive information that some would go to extreme lengths to extract.”

Alec was working his way towards livid. “Are you telling me that Jace is off running around with _Valentine’s daughter_? And you just _let them go_? And did she say _Circle members_?”

Magnus shook his head. “He’s not in any danger, Alec. At least, not from her. Let Dot finish and I’ll tell you the rest later. And perhaps...hmm.” He paused and pursed his lips, trying not to laugh despite tone of the conversation. “Maybe you’ll be a tad more comfortable if you relax. Take a few deep breaths?”

Alec frowned in confusion. “What are you talking about?”

They all looked up when they heard Tessa, woken and drawn into the room by Alec’s outburst, give a very unladylike snort.

“You’ve done the puff again,” she said, not bothering to hide her mirth.

Alec’s face went bright red and he snapped his wings as close to his body as he could; they had a habit of “puffing out” whenever he got angry or scared, which was embarrassing since he almost never knew it was happening until someone inevitably started laughing.

(Izzy had always blamed it on his face: “You’ve got these huge, dark, bad ass wings behind you and then there’s… well, _you._ It’s like looking at a fluffy, angry kitten; we can’t take you seriously.”

“Izzy, I am a _grown man_ ,” Alec had said indignantly, greatly offended. She’d just laughed harder.)

Having it happen in front of Magnus basically made him want to die on the spot.

“Can we please get back to the subject?” Alec bit out, glamouring his wings by habit.

“Oh, darling, don’t hide them,” Magnus said. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to embarrass you.”

Alec relaxed marginally but left the glamour on regardless. He had a feeling there was still a lot left to Dot’s story, and it probably wasn’t going to make him feel any calmer.

Once everyone settled down and Tessa had been caught up, the mood became serious once more.

“Anyway… Jocelyn was gone and I could tell there were too many for me to fight alone,” Dot said eventually. “I tried to run—if I couldn’t save Jocelyn, I thought I would at least be able to warn someone, get help. But I was too slow. Once they had me they started asking where ‘they’ were. I—I didn’t know what they were talking about at first. I wouldn’t have been able to tell them even if I did.” She looked at Magnus. “They’re looking for the cup and… the _book_.”

Magnus took a startled breath and glanced almost nervously at Alec before asking Dot, “How could they possibly know about the book?”

“You know how,” Tessa said solemnly. “There have been whispers for a while but no one wanted to believe them.”

Magnus swallowed thickly and said, “He’s back. He must be.”

“Who is back?” Alec asked. He looked around the room, taking in the pale, shaken faces of some of the most powerful people he’d ever met, and he knew. He just didn’t want to believe it. “Valentine is _dead_ ,” he said. “They found his remains, for Angel’s sake!”

Magnus shook his head. “I don’t know who actually died in that house, but there are some of us who have always wondered if he was still out there, biding his time…”

Clearing her throat, Dot said, “There’s more. The magic—the portal and the magic used to attack me—it was done by—” Dot cut herself off and shivered. “The bastards had a warlock on a _leash_ , and everything it did was… tainted. Dark. Even its body was twisted. It would have killed me if it hadn’t run out of energy. I’m pretty sure they thought I was dead anyway.” She looked up at Alec. “You and your friends got there just minutes after they left; I thought they had come back to finish the job.”

There was silence for a few moments, and then Alec looked up from his clenched hands. “It’s another one, isn’t it?” he asked Magnus. “Another— _me_? Except he didn’t quite get this one right.”

Tessa sighed. “We have no way of knowing that, Alec,” she said. “Some warlocks just come out more _demon_ than _human—_ that could be the case here.”

“If it is, though… If he’s trying to—” Magnus glanced at Alec “—ah, _replicate past success_ and failing, that could be why he’s coming out of the woodwork now. Maybe the book has the information he needs to recreate the situation perfectly.”

“What is this book?” Alec demanded. The whole situation, theoretical or not, was beginning to become a bit too much.

“Valentine was almost fanatical about his experimenting,” Magnus answered. “He kept a meticulous journal, recording… _everything_. If he recorded what he did with your parents, that means he—or anyone in possession of the book—could potentially do it again.”

“It was never found after his ‘death’,” Tessa said. “It was always assumed that he’d hidden it somewhere before the Uprising, but it would make just as much sense that Jocelyn hid it instead.”

Alec stood up and began to pace in frustration. “But _why_?” he asked. “The cup, I understand; he could make himself an army of Circle members. Why recreate me, though? With the glamour it’s not like I look like a warlock. For all he knows I’m a normal Shadowhunter and the experiment was just another failure.”

“But if someone did know,” Tessa began slowly, “an army of _you_ would be much more powerful than any Shadowhunter army.”

“No matter how you say it, Angel blood or not, _I’m a warlock_ ,” Alec huffed. He’d come to terms with that little fact a while ago, but saying it out loud always sent a pang through his chest. “A huge part of me is exactly what his whole movement wants to eradicate. Why would he want more?”

“Your parents thought he was giving them a warrior unlike anything they’d seen before,” Magnus finally said. “A warrior that could finally begin to forge a path to the complete elimination of demons—even if that meant you had demon blood running through you yourself. Maybe he did. Perhaps it is simply that the ends would justify the means.”

“Alec,” Tessa said gently when it looked like he still wanted to argue. “You are _powerful_. With enough training you could easily become the most powerful warlock _or_ Shadowhunter that has been seen in years. With your parabatai you are just as strong as any other Shadowhunter, but when you add your magic… Instead of being stunted, like your runes, you _excel_ in your magic. If Valentine can replicate that and raise the children in the Circle—there’s almost nothing that could stand in his way.”

“And if he can’t find the book,” Magnus said in a grave voice, “he’s going to want _you_ , Alec, and Valentine doesn’t stop until he gets what he wants.”

Alec swallowed and crossed his arms, almost hugging himself. He’d stopped pacing near the window and looked out onto the busy street. He almost— _almost—_ wished, in that moment, that he was just another clueless mundane waiting at a crosswalk to get to get back to work after lunch. Did they know how easy they had it down there? He didn’t suppose any of them suddenly had the possibility of potentially meeting the twisted lunatic who had created them looming above their heads. He blinked and shook his head.

“Regardless,” he said eventually, “he doesn’t know. He can’t; no one does outside of family and you three. I put enough glamours on myself when we’re hunting that even if he _was_ stalking me, he’d never be able to see anything that would tip him off that I’m anything other than one hundred percent Shadowhunter.”

“I hope you’re right,” Magnus murmured. “Either way it is imperative that we move quickly to find the cup; the havoc he could wreak if it fell into his hands is unthinkable.”

  


Izzy walked down the hall of the Institute’s residential wing quickly, her mind on Alec’s brief but somewhat frightening phone call. He couldn’t tell her much over the phone, even in the privacy of her runed bedroom, but if she had interpreted his code correctly then what he did say shook her to her core.

Valentine—back from the dead. It was like something from a bad teen novella.

She shuddered as she walked towards Jace’s room to tell him the news. He and Clary had gotten back fairly recently, so she knew he had to be nearby. And indeed, his door was cracked open a hair. Izzy pushed her way in and paused, surprised to see only Clary sitting alone on the edge of the bed.

“Hey…” Izzy said.

“Hey.”

Silence. Clary hardly even looked up from the small, rectangular silk drawstring bag she was turning over and over in her hands, instead choosing to glare at it, shoulders hunched, as if it held the answers to all her problems.

“You okay?” Izzy asked slowly, moving to sit next to her on the bed. “We’re going to find her, you know.”

Clary snorted inelegantly. “That is the tip of the iceberg here,” she said, then paused. “An iceberg that keeps getting bigger every time I think I’ve seen the whole thing.”

“Want to talk about it?” Izzy asked.

Clary began to shake her head, but when Izzy ran a soothing hand down her back it was like a dam had broken.

“Well,” she began, lower lip trembling weakly and voice getting more and more shrill as she listed off her woes, “first off, I go to tell my mom’s best friend she’s been kidnapped, and he decides it’s a good time to tell me that he’s a _werewolf_ , I’ve been having my memories wiped regularly since I was, like, nine, and apparently I’m the freaking _daughter of_ _Shadowhunter Hitler_.”

Izzy was _really_ glad Clary was staring at her bag so intently; she probably wouldn’t appreciate how close she was to laughing. Once she had silently composed herself, she said, “That’s a pretty shitty iceberg.” She took Clary’s wet hiccup/laugh hybrid as a win and nudged her leg with her own. “What’s so cool about that bag?”

The question did not have the intended effect; instead of being distracted, Clary began crying in earnest as she said, “I saw it on Luke’s counter and—and he said it’s my mom’s birthday gift to me, but—but since she’s not here—”

“Hey… I know it seems hopeless right now, Clary, but I swear we’re going to get her back,” Izzy said confidently.

Clary sniffed and wiped at her face, grabbing tissues from Jace’s nightstand. “He really didn’t want me to take them,” she continued. “I think he was more freaked out than he seemed, but he was trying to act all strong and manly for me or something. I took them while he was talking to Jace about some cup. They’re tarot cards. My mom—my mom painted them herself.” Clary untied the bag with something close to reverence and took out the cards. She held them for a moment before handing them to Izzy.

“These are beautiful,” Izzy said softly. She tried to hand them back, but instead caught Clary as she crumpled in on herself and continued crying. Izzy maneuvered them to Jace’s pillows, pulling Clary down with her and stroking her hair as she truly let go for the first time since the violent scene at the club had started the whole mess for her.

When Jace got back to his room bearing plates of food, he saw Clary fast asleep, her face tear-streaked but peaceful, tucked into Izzy’s side. Izzy looked up and met his eyes with a small, sad smile, and motioned him inside, knowing he had to be just as tired as Clary.

Alec returned home to the surreal scene of Jace, Clary, and Izzy all curled together, sleeping soundly on Jace’s bed surrounded by intricately painted tarot cards.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is maybe half of what I had planned for this whole chapter. I don't know how it got away from me, but I don't think I mind. The Izzy and Clary section wasn't in the plan at all; this was supposed to end with a really nice Malec scene, but this came out instead. Next chapter, on my honor, will be a major step in Alec's romantic life, and probably a whole lot less plot movement. (It should also be out a WHOLE lot more quickly than this one (like, maybe a week and a half?), but I've learned not to promise things like that so I'll just stay cautiously optimistic.)
> 
> Please feel free to let me know what you thought, if anyone is still reading at this point, haha. I do apologize for the wait, and for not having replied to every comment yet. For everyone who has read this story, regardless of comments/kudos/whatever, I appreciate every single one of you.
> 
> Also it's super late and I've been writing for six hours so if there are errors, 1) sorry, and 2) please tell me so I can fix it when I wake up ><


	11. Chapter 11

Alec browsed Magnus’s extensive workshop as he waited for the other man to return. After leaving the others to get some well-deserved rest, Alec had combed the Institute’s resources looking for anything that might be a lead on the whereabouts of Valentine or the cup, but came out empty-handed. Frustrated and still more exhausted than he liked to admit, he had called Tessa to get her opinion and ended up on the doorstep of the High Warlock.

Crisp footsteps snapped Alec out of his perusal of an assortment of jars on a shelf, though his eyes lingered on one in particular—vampire fangs. Not particularly out of place in a warlock’s workshop, but the size of the collection was significantly larger than Alec’s admittedly limited definition of normal, and served to remind him of Magnus’ age; vampire fangs were notoriously hard to acquire legally, and a collection this large must have taken decades—if not centuries—to obtain.

Looking at Magnus now, entering the room with a glass in each hand, hair swept up and looking impressively put together, Alec figured most people would assume his age to be somewhere in the late twenties. It was hard to reconcile the image before him with the evidence of such a powerful, immortal being in the room around him, even though technically he was one himself, minus the age and experience—but his own immortality was something he didn’t like to think about.

“Here we are,” Magnus said, handing Alec one of the glasses. “And before you ask, my dear, responsible Shadowhunter, these are indeed for focus rather than intoxication. We’ll save the fun ones for later.”

Alec blushed and gave a small smile. “Thank you. I’m sorry we had to postpone our dinner plans for work.”

Magnus waved him off. “There will be other opportunities. Besides, working together to prevent the second uprising of an insane tyrant might be a great way to get to know each other, who knows?”

“Sure,” Alec snorted. He grew serious and said, “I tried tracking Clary’s mother with every method I could think of, Shadowhunter and magical, but it’s like I come up against a wall. I feel like I could get past it if I pushed hard enough, but it started wearing me out too quickly.”

Magnus looked thoughtful. “Have you tried to track through wards before?”

Shaking his head, Alec said, “I don’t think so. Usually I either find what I’m looking for, or it’s over water. I’ve never just been _blocked_ before.”

“What are you trying to track her with?”

Alec reached into his pocket and pulled out one of Clary’s tarot cards.

“She painted these for Clary,” Alec said, handing it to Magnus.

“The High Priestess,” Magnus murmured, gazing at the intricate painting. The card showed an elaborately dressed woman holding a large book in her outstretched arms. Alec found the card unsettling; the woman held the book in a way that almost made him want to reach in and take it.

Alec watched Magnus close his eyes and focus. After a moment, Magnus blinked and looked back at Alec.

“You’re right,” Magnus said. “The wards are indeed strangely constructed. I can’t break them on my own, but we may be able to do it together.”

Alec nodded nervously. He had worked magic while using energy from another person, like with Jace in the shop, but he had yet to do magic in tandem with another warlock, sharing both magic and energy. Tessa had mentioned it briefly, once, but declared it too advanced and moved on. Had he not been about to enter an apprenticeship with Magnus, Alec wouldn’t have even considered it. Sharing magic was said to be a very intimate experience, and not something to be done lightly with an acquaintance.

Magnus hummed thoughtfully. “This will be a good opportunity to see how well our magic does together.”

“Our magic?” Alec asked.

“Indeed,” Magnus replied. “There’s a reason most warlocks prefer to work alone. Mixing magic with someone incompatible can have disastrous results.”

“I’m not sure I follow,” Alec admitted. He’d been told it was personal, but he had not heard that it was dangerous. “It’s not like magic has its own personality. Wouldn’t it matter more if _we_ clash?”

“While that is important as well, clashing personalities tend to cause fewer explosions than clashing magic,” Magnus said ruefully. “A dear friend once took an apprentice in a fit of boredom. The first potion they tried to create together that could incorporate shared magic—a simple one that would boost plant growth—ended up setting the plant on fire. It was as if their mixed magical auras had _curdled_ the potion. He never did get the smell out of that room...” Magnus mused.

Alec winced. “This is a little more important than a plant. Should we do something else first? A small test? I don’t want to… set her on fire instead of track her, or whatever.”

Magnus held back a smile. “I don’t think we could do much damage with a tracking spell, but I suppose that’s what Ragnor must have thought before the plant fiasco.” Magnus considered him for a moment, then asked, “Tessa taught you how to summon objects, yes?”

“Of course,” Alec replied, a little embarrassed that he was apparently giving Magnus the impression that he was a complete novice.

“Good,” Magnus said. He took their half-empty glasses and put them on the table, then held out his hands, palms facing up. “Rest your hands on mine and close your eyes.”

Alec complied with a blush. His hands were warm and soft, and Alec thought he could almost feel the thrum of Magnus’s magic just under his skin.

“Reach into your core,” Magnus instructed softly. “Focus your awareness on your magic. Harness it as if you were about to use it, but keep it just within reach, feel it running through you.”

Alec breathed deeply and did as he was told. Keeping his magic at bay but constantly at the ready was something he had learned to do well, since it was a practice most useful in combat. Alec knew a warlock’s magic was almost always immediately accessible, of course, but having it ready at his fingertips meant he could use it more quickly and in more powerful amounts at once.

Magnus continued, “Now extend that awareness to me, my hands connected to yours. Feel my magic running through me as yours does through you.”

Alec concentrated on that thrum he felt before, and found that if he put enough effort into it, he could follow it to Magnus’s own core, see his magic resting at its source, and it took his breath away. He could feel his own magic yearning to reach for Magnus’s even before Magnus told him to do it.

“That’s it,” Magnus said, sounding as breathless as Alec felt. “Open yourself up to it and send yours through me as I send mine through you. When you are ready, summon an object as you normally would, but focus on using this mixed magic as if it were one.”

Alec felt like he could get lost in the feeling of their magic mingling, almost becoming impossible to tell apart, as if it was truly coming from one source. Before he could become too distracted, he summoned the first thing he thought of: a single flower off of a tree he had passed on the way to the loft. It would be simple and specific enough that they’d know if it worked well, without too much danger of anything catastrophic happening. Or at least, that was his line of thought.

He released the joined magic, and after a moment, when they could feel the spell had been cast, he opened his eyes expecting to find the flower on the desk. Instead, they both gasped softly as they looked around in awe at hundreds of flower petals drifting to the floor around them, carpeting the room up to their ankles.

“A little much for a test, I think,” Magnus said with a small smile, the look on his face a bit like he’d just gotten off of a wild carnival ride.

“That, ah… Huh,” Alec said, dumbstruck. “That’s not really what I had intended.”

“Well, while it might not be exactly what we went for, it’s not a fire, and I think that’s good enough to try the tracking,” Magnus said, looking around once more before reluctantly waving a hand to remove the petals. He placed his hand back under Alec’s and gazed at him seriously.

“Are you ready?”  


 

Izzy strode purposefully toward the Institute’s library, frustrated that she had to resort to going over already covered ground by sifting through their collections again. She knew Alec had been thorough, but she could think of nowhere else any useful information could be.

She slowed when she heard hushed, angry voices, instinctively quieting her footsteps to stay hidden. Applying a silencing rune and cracking the door open, Izzy peered inside and frowned. Hodge was standing to the side of a desk, a bookshelf obscuring whoever he was talking to. He looked angry and slightly fearful, and Izzy had a feeling of foreboding as she listened to the unfamiliar voice.

“—any more excuses! I’ve given you time, and you’ve delivered nothing. It's time to move, with or without them.”

“Please, just one more week,” Hodge asked. “Everyone here is actively looking for the cup, and that will lead us to the book as well. If you take him now you’ll give everything away and we might lose a chance at finding them at all.”

There was silence for a long moment as both Izzy and Hodge held their breath.

“One week. After that I take him with or without the cup and our deal is off. You can rot here while I extract the solution by hand.”

Izzy winced, but Hodge visibly relaxed.

“Thank you,” he said gratefully, but there was no answer. After a moment he touched a ring on his finger and there was more silence. Izzy frowned; the Institute wards wouldn’t allow portals, but the unidentified man was very clearly gone.

Izzy quietly backed away and tapped furiously on her phone. She needed to find Jace and get to Alec as soon as she could if she was interpreting what she had just seen correctly.

“Izzy?”

She froze. She’d only made it a few yards before Hodge’s voice rang out through the hallway. Shoving her phone in her pocket, she plastered a smile on her face and turned quickly.

“Hodge! I was just coming to see you but I got an urgent text from Alec. I need to go help him—”

“Can I borrow you for a moment before you run off?” Hodge asked.

“He really needs me right away,” Izzy said, edging her way backwards. She couldn’t tell whether he had seen her spying or not, but she didn’t intend on finding out while alone in a room with him.

Hodge advanced as Izzy backed up, reaching her before she had a chance to turn. He took her arm in a firm grip and gave her a regretful smile.

“It will only take a moment,” he said as he turned, guiding her into the library and shutting the door.

 

 

The tarot card held between them, Alec placed his hands over Magnus’s once more, this time with more confidence. Sharing their magic had indeed been intimate, but he found himself eager to try again.

Instead of waiting for Alec to begin this time, Magnus started the ritual. Alec felt a chill go up his arms before he went deeper into himself and could feel Magnus’s magic mingling with his in his core. He opened himself to the magic and had to give himself a moment to just _feel_ their magic churning together before he could focus on the task at hand. At Magnus’s signal, they both began the tracking spell.

Almost immediately they hit the same wards Alec had experienced before. Less a solid, impenetrable wall as they should have been, and more like an old door that might give way at any moment.

Alec and Magnus both took a second to gather themselves—could feel _each other_ gathering themselves, the experience stopping just short of actually sharing their thoughts—and as one, they pushed forward with the combined force of their magic.

The ward shattered easily, and they were standing in a dark, dank room filled with molding boxes and dripping pipes, the few windows so caked with dirt they let no light in. Crouching in the middle of the room, chuckling menacingly at some creature strung up in chains attached to the far wall, was a large man. While there was a limit to their shared consciousness, Alec could gather enough of a hunch from Magnus to be sure—this was Valentine.

As if he had heard them, Valentine suddenly stood and turned, freezing Alec’s breath in his chest as it seemed Valentine looked him straight in the eyes. The man angrily moved towards them, his bellowed, “ _What are you doing here_?” shocking Alec so badly he ripped his hands away from Magnus and stumbled backwards with a shout. He hit the desk with a thud, but Magnus was able to catch and support him before he fell to the ground.

“It’s alright, Alec, he’s not here,” Magnus said soothingly, one hand on Alec’s arm, steadying him, and one resting just over his heart as if Magnus could calm it’s erratic beats with proximity alone. “There must have been a door right behind us and someone came through.”

Still shaken, Alec looked at Magnus and asked, “That was him. Right? That was the man that—that _created_ me?”

The only reply Magnus could give was a gentle, “I’m afraid so.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alrighty, see you in 3 months! (I'm kidding) (I hope)
> 
> The whole magic-sharing thing came out of nowhere and took over, so there's that. Hopefully it made enough sense to not be awful. Speaking of awful, as a fun task, count how many blatant cliches I've used in this chapter! It's a lot. 
> 
> Feel free to leave any con-crit, good or bad. Thank you so much to everyone who has commented; you're the reason this chapter didn't take even longer. I think we can all just accept that my updates are sporadic at best, but I promise I'm trying.


	12. Chapter 12

Izzy watched from her chair as Hodge paced in front of her. He ran a frustrated hand through his hair, muttering to himself, and Izzy quickly nixed any improvised plans she’d been creating to lie herself out of the situation. This wasn’t Hodge, the man she’d practically been raised by, who would laugh off her skulking with a halfhearted reprimand. No, this was a man she hadn’t seen before, a frantic traitor that reeked of desperation.

“What have you done, Hodge?” Izzy asked quietly.

Hodge paused and stared hard at Izzy before leaning over to get in her face. “What _I’ve_ done, Isabelle? _I_ have spent _years_ holed up here in this angel-forsaken Institute, training your brother to be the most elite warrior Shadowhunters have ever seen, and _you_ have gone and reduced it all to nothing!” he hissed.

“Me?” Izzy blinked and gripped the edge of the chair so she didn’t shake the answers she needed right out of the man. “Hodge, I overheard the end of a conversation! That’s all. I don’t know why—”

“That’s all?” Hodge sneered, resuming his pacing. “You expect me to believe you had your phone out to play solitaire? I know you were contacting them, telling them everything.”

“You’re really overestimating what I actually heard, Hodge,” Izzy laughed uncertainly. “If—if me hearing something is putting Alec in danger, you know I’d never say anything. I’ll keep it a secret, I’ll—”

“But you didn’t, did you?” Hodge slammed his hands on the arms of her chair and leaned in close. “Can you honestly tell me, Izzy, that there is _nothing_ in your messages that would cause your impulsive brothers to confront me? That they’re not leaping to conclusions right this moment as they interpret your coded warning? Don’t look so surprised, I _taught_ you that.”

“Then you know it would be purposefully vague,” Izzy said, glad her voice didn’t give away her increasing nerves. “I can take it back, Hodge, really. I’ll just tell them it was a mistake and everything can go back to normal.”

Izzy watched him consider her for a moment, but soon he shook his head and her heart sunk.

“I can’t risk it,” he said finally, straightening and fingering the ring on his hand solemnly. “It’s a damn waste… all that work. I was trying to buy us time. Buy _him_ time.” Hodge looked at Izzy with surprising intensity. “I wanted to _protect_ him, Izzy. I know it’s hard to believe now, but I do care. And now Valentine will destroy him.”

  


Magnus watched from his seat on the couch as Alec paced slowly, anxiously rubbing his thumb into his palm, and summoned another drink. After their unexpected peek at Valentine Magnus had been able to talk Alec down from a mild panic attack, but since then he’d been stuck in a quiet, intense introspective state. He jumped a bit when Alec suddenly stopped and turned toward him.

“Why is this messing with me so much?” he asked, finally. “He’s just—he’s just a _man_ , and men can be beaten, and—I’m not normally like this. We weren’t even really there!”

Setting aside his drink, Magnus stood and slowly walked closer. “Alec, I can’t pretend to know exactly how you’re feeling, but I think in your circumstances it’s alright to feel a bit off kilter,” he said gently. “You were born _different_ into a race that was built on conformity, and you were just face-to-face—in a sense—with the man responsible for that difference. Give yourself a break.”

Alec ran a hand over his face and took a deep breath. “I guess you’re right,” he said. Magnus saw a flash of vulnerability cross Alec’s face before he schooled his features and said, “I don’t like feeling so powerless. I like to be in control of my life.”

“You don’t say,” Magnus said with a quirk of his lips, hoping to lighten Alec’s mood some. “You struck me as so carefree.”

Alec huffed, frown lifting enough to make Magnus smile, pleased. “You and Izzy are going to get along great,” he muttered with an eye roll.

“I certainly hope so,” Magnus said, surprising himself with his answer. He considered his words for a moment before he said, “I never thought, in all my years, that I’d say that about a Lightwood and now I’m actually looking forward to getting to know several of you. My, how times change.”

Alec grimaced at the reminder of his parents’ reputation. “I hope we don’t disappoint.”

“Oh, darling,” Magnus said, not intending for it to sound so lecherous, but enjoying the almost immediate flush that ran down Alec’s neck anyway as their eyes locked, “I don’t think you could be disappointing if you tried.”

Alec choked a little before clearing his throat self-consciously and taking a step back, reluctantly breaking his gaze. “We should, um—” he stuttered, cursing himself internally for his apparent inability to function like a normal adult. “Let’s get back to work?”

“If we must,” Magnus sighed theatrically and headed back to the couch, watching Alec retreat to the relative safety of his armchair. Magnus tried to feel bad for spooking him, but he figured it was worth it to see the fear and dread that had filled Alec at the sight of Valentine be replaced by a small, slightly embarrassed smile.

That smile faded, however, as their minds wandered back toward more serious matters.

“Something that’s bothering me,” Alec began suddenly, “is that he was there at all.”

“What do you mean?” Magnus asked.

“Just that—it was her mother’s card,” Alec said. “We were tracking her mother. How did we end up with him?”

Magnus hummed in agreement. “That is an interesting point. Do you think—”

They were both startled out of their thoughts as someone started pounding on the door.

“Magnus Bane!” shouted a muffled, but still distinct voice.

Alec groaned and got up to follow Magnus to the entry. How someone so small could be so shrill was a mystery to him.

Magnus pulled the heavy door open and indeed revealed Clary, a frustrated look on her face, and a sheepish Jace behind her. Jace gave Alec a “what can you do?” shrug, and Alec just shook his head, leading them back to the sitting area. He could think of plenty to do, but nothing that would be particularly helpful at that moment.

“To what do I owe this pleasure, biscuit?” Magnus asked, tactfully ignoring the girl’s clear impatience.

“Luke told us you’re the warlock that took my memories,” Clary said bluntly. “I need them back. I might have known something that could help my mother.”

“Ah,” Magnus said reluctantly. “Several important points here. I’m surprised Lucian let you leave without explaining further, actually.” Alec gathered from Jace’s expression at those words that they had probably rushed off before giving Luke the chance to elaborate. Magnus continued, “First, I find the word ‘took’ misleading; your mother paid me to remove your memories of the Downworld once your Sight came in. She paid me just like any other of my clients to whom I render a service.”

Clary huffed and crossed her arms. “Still—”

“ _Second_ ,” Magnus continued, “while I would happily retrieve your memories, it is unfortunately beyond my abilities.”

Alec and Jace’s phones both chimed, but the conversation in front of them held their attention.

Gaping, Clary sputtered, “What do you mean, beyond your abilities?”

“I mean,” Magnus said patiently, “that at your mother’s request they were fed to a memory demon, and getting something back after it has been eaten by a demon is quite a bit harder than you’d imagine.”

Clary looked lost for words for a moment before she clenched her hands at her waist and said, “Listen, _warlock—_ ”

“ _Enough_.” Alec stood and walked between where Clary stood and Magnus sat, his height making him loom over her. “Listen, I get that this is a difficult situation, but you’re in a different world now and you need to follow its rules. That means acting like a damn adult instead of an ungrateful _child_ and not mouthing off at the man who’s spent the last few hours trying to track your mother.”

Clary inhaled sharply and looked away, her lower lip trembling slightly before she firmed her mouth and took a slow breath.

“You’re right,” she said, managing to sound steady. “I’m—I’m sorry. I was just so sure that this would be the answer—” Clary’s voice broke off and she cleared her throat. “Excuse me,” she said, and hurried into the next room.

“Dude.” Jace looked at Alec and shook his head lightly. “Maybe a little harsh? She’s had a lot to process.”

Alec refused to feel guilty, though he felt a little awkward under Magnus’s assessing gaze. “You don’t come in and insult someone in their own damn living room,” Alecmutteredfinally. “Even mundanes can behave better than that.”

Before Jace could respond, his and Alec’s phones sounded again. They glanced at each other and pulled them out.

“Shit,” Alec said, pocketing his phone and preparing to make a portal.

“ _Shit_ ,” Jace agreed. “Clary! We gotta go!”

“What’s going on?” Magnus asked, coming to Alec’s side.

“Izzy’s got trouble,” Alec said quickly. He looked at Jace and said, “Do you really think—Hodge?”

Jace swallowed and shrugged. “Maybe she’s wrong,” he said, though they each knew how unlikely that was.

Alec created the portal and motioned the group through, meeting Magnus’s eyes and knowing he had his support without asking. With a steadying breath, Alec stepped through last and into his office in the Institute, the only place there that allowed portals at all, closing it behind himself and taking off with the others toward the library.

They crashed through the door and almost immediately stumbled to a halt, trying to understand the scene before them.

Hodge was standing behind Izzy, one hand keeping her still in the chair, and the other holding a dagger to her throat. After her text, that was mostly expected. It was the faint form of Valentine Morgenstern standing just a few feet away that gave them pause and sent a chill down Alec’s spine.

The man turned his head to look at the group and gave a sickly smile. “My, my, what perfect timing, children. I’ve just been informed that my plans must be moved up, but of course I don’t mind.” Valentine looked them over almost hungrily and laughed. “And everyone is here. How wonderful—long lost daughter—your mother misses you, by the way—dutiful son… and my perfect soldier. I’ve been waiting for this day for a very long time.”

Alec felt sick. Jace shook his head beside him and frowned.

“I don’t know you,” he said. “My father is dead. I saw him die.”

Valentine just smiled and activated a rune that changed his form completely into another man, this one slightly taller and blonde. “Apologies for the confusion, my boy. Better?”

Jace shook his head harder, his breath coming out faster. “I saw him _die_ ,” he insisted.

Valentine smiled indulgently. “You saw one of my men die. You know I’m telling the truth; you know what I always said about liars. Look at me. _Listen_ to me, my speech patterns… You know who I am.”

Alec knew he needed to end this now. “You’re not really here,” he said firmly. He didn’t know what was going on or how they were seeing him, but he could take some guesses. “You can’t do anything like this, why even show yourself?”

“Oh, but my boy, _he_ can,” Valentine replied, gesturing at Hodge. “A twitch of the wrist and your sister is dead. He’s been telling me so much about what you can do, so you’re going to do a few things for _me_ now—like create yourself a portal to my location so we can finally— _No_!”

Everyone watched in what seemed like slow motion as Magnus, hands moving unnoticed behind the rest of the group, used his magic to yank Hodge’s hand back just enough for Izzy to twist around. Within seconds she had him immobilized chest-down on the floor, arm turned painfully behind his back.

“Someone get the ring!” she shouted, struggling to keep her hold on him.

Alec and Clary shook themselves out of their shocked stillness, Clary rushing to yank the ring off Hodge’s hand, cutting off Valentine’s frustrated roar midway as the man faded away, and Alec hitting Hodge with a combined physical and magical punch that immediately rendered him unconscious.

The ensuing silence was deafening, everyone confused and catching their breaths.

“What just happened?” Clary finally asked.

“Hodge has been contacting him for years, apparently,” Izzy said bitterly, brushing herself off. “They said—Alec, all their efforts are going to be concentrated on you now. He hasn’t been able to find the book he’s looking for and now he just wants _you_.”

“Why?” Alec asked, though from Magnus and Dot’s conversation, he thought he probably knew.

Magnus sighed and confirmed Alec’s fears. “He can’t find the book, so his closest hope of recreating his success will be through you and your blood.”

Alec decided he didn’t really want to think about any of that just yet. “Well, we’ll just make sure he doesn’t get me.” He spoke over the resulting arguments and said, “We still need to get Clary’s mom before he decides he’s done waiting on her as well. Magnus, do you have the card? We can try tracking her again and stay long enough to get a location this time.”

“You want to go _to_ him?” Izzy yelled.

“We can send a team, I just need to help track him,” Alec said, sounding much calmer than he felt.

Jace cleared his throat and all heads turned toward him.

“We don’t need to track him,” he said quietly, still staring at the space Valentine had occupied. “I know where he is.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lordy, the pacing of this story is weird. Hope you enjoyed stuff actually happening! Though please tell me if anything was confusing. 
> 
> Thank you so much for all of your comments, and feel free to leave any con-crit or typos I missed. Sorry about the massive wait for this chapter. Life, man. Ugh.


End file.
